Thursday, December 6, 2007

10 reasons i hate san diego

i've moved around quite a bit in my life. i've lived, throughout my life, in 5 states, traveled to almost all 50, and 7 countries. i've been to a fair amount of places, but i have to say that san diego rates pretty low on my list of favorite places. don't misunderstand- it's ok for some people. but i'm different than most people, and just because other people like it doesn't mean that i will. also, it has its benefits. and i am glad i had the chance to live here- i met the most amazing girl in the world here. buuuuut, i feel about as eager to leave san diego as i was to leave kentucky. here's why:

10. its environment. the amount of smog in the air has been coming to my attention a lot more lately. also, there is such a dearth of cutting-edge environmental spectacles. for instance, i never see waterless urinals in this semi-arid climate, i don't see many cfl lights in this blackout-prone city, and it's more common to see a 4x4 monster truck than a civic.

9. its military complex. goes hand-in-hand with the 4x4 monster trucks. yes, people here support the american terrorism in iraq because many of the soldiers in iraq were deployed from san diego. in some areas of this city, the type-a alpha males rule, and if you are not like them, you are "feminine". here, strength precedes intelligence. reminds me a lot of the south.

8. its lack of good coffee/tea shops. to repeat a friend from the bay area, "this is starbucks territory". i must pay respects to three coffee shops san diego really needs. these are pannikin (any location), rebecca's coffee house, and influx cafe. other than these (and a couple other places), there's really not much to brag about. good luck finding a tea shop here: the best place to get loose-leaf tea is a place in old town- the service is terrible, it closes early, and there's no seating.

7. its complacency. people here are comfortable with where they are in life (no matter where that may be), and feel no need to grow or challenge or be different. i'm sick of being stared at because i don't follow the norm. and if i challenge what is the mainstream opinion, i get ostracized.

6. its superficiality. one word to describe san diego? superficial. if you're ever in san diego, don't try to talk to anyone about something that actually matters. if you do, you're a very strange person. if you're a female visiting san diego and want to blend in with the locals, come prepared with too much make-up and too much time to spend looking at yourself in the mirror. the superficiality even seeps into public spaces: sdsu's campus green areas are not meant to be walked on or sat on; they're meant to be looked at. there's not much to do in balboa park beside walk in the developed areas.

5. its culture/history. san diego has it. but it's solely oriented around surfing. this area is not known for its art, its sophistication, or its finesse. there's history here, too, but the problem is that cabrillo and his successors wiped it out to establish their own history. people here tend to forget about that. on a side note, although i am very tolerant, respectful, and supportive of the northern mexico culture, i personally don't like it very much; but this culture is very prominently displayed and ingrained here.

4. its citizens' attitudes. i can't figure out why people here are so far removed from their relationships. your friends don't reveal their soul to you. in fact, unless you know someone well, they will hardly make eye contact with you. moreover, your friends don't introduce you to more friends- that's up to you.

3. its exclusivity. everything's 21-and-up, which isn't a hindrance for me anymore, but these rules make it hard to have younger friends. before i turned 21, i couldn't find anything to do here, believe it or not. it's also exclusive in terms of prejudice: they expect certain things from certain people, making stereotypes normative.

2. its political atmosphere. i've gotten the impression here that you shouldn't challenge the government, that things going on in city hall are not my business, and that republicans are god's children. i want to hide from people that i vote neither democrat nor republican, and don't politically support anyone i disagree with. i carry many socialist ideals, but that doesn't mean i'm a socialist either, a concept incomprehensible to most people here.

1. its inaccessibility. everything worth going to is disconnected from the rest of the city: south park has 1 bus running through it, ocean beach is almost literally disconnected from the city, and north park has jems, but they are also spread out. i want to live in a city connected by public transportation and that allows walking. try living in san diego without a car. yeah. it would suck.

this list spilled onto the screen way too fast. yeah, i hate it here. maybe seattle or san francisco next?


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The Observer said...

Dude, I couldn't agree more with almost all your reasons. A lot of urban centers are producers of smog, and San Diego is no exception. Plus, given its notorious staunch Republican base, going green is like going Democrat, and God forbid someone do the ultimate sin of switching parties *GASP*.

I also agree with your views on San Diego's problems with inaccessibility (San Francisco was so much easier and I had no need to get a car), military complex, political atmosphere, and its superficiality.

As for culture and history, there is a show on NBC called About San Diego that has all these neat stories about tidbits that are well known and tidbits about the tiniest details of the county. Whether these things relate to Cabrillo is anyone's guess.

Penny Dreadful said...

I feel the exact same way. I have been here for 2 years and only have 2 more to go. My husband and I don't have even ONE friend who is from here. In fact, all of our friends are from the NY (home state) and the rust belt.

No one has any sort of "Moxie" here or any integrity for their personal character; they roll over with everything. I get called a "bitch" at least once a week for sticking up for myself, complaining about ridiculously bad service or telling someone to be quiet in a movie theater (hubby and I have stopped going out to movies because people can't keep their mouths shut out here).

I can't even begin to tell you the amount of times someone has severely screwed up my life because they lied to me (no one likes to tell it how it is and tend to sugarcoat everything), were lazy and didn't do the work they were supposed to do, or went back on their word.

I always wondered who seriously gave a damn about all this pop culture garbage and who listened to such terrible, listless music, now I know; everything I hate about pop culture is worshiped here and comes from here. People will sell themselves out in a minute when styles change. It's sad.

Good luck to you, I hate it here too. I don't think the fact that I dislike hot weather, lack of seasons and relentless sunshine helps either.

Maybe we should form a support group? ;)

ruu kwon do said...


Bravo! My girlfriend and I moved to “Sun Diego” June 2007 from Pennsylvania just to try something different. Needless to say we are moving back in 2 weeks. The whole San Diego experience has been horrible. Everything you said and the above comments have said is completely correct.

We’ve been here over a year and have made 0 real friends. People here just want to surf, tan, and hang out at the beach. Our apartment complex is totally inept and cannot handle the smallest issue within the complex. There are homeless people EVERYWHERE; we actually saw two bums having “relations” downtown IN THE GASLAMP. They wake us up in the middle of the night crushing cans and diving into the dumpster. And everyone seems to think this is normal. The museums in Balboa Park seem like they were just thrown together for tourist; the zoo is not very good besides having some panda bears. Also being a hockey fan in SD doesn’t help. People here ask me if I like rugby when I wear my ice hockey jerseys. (NOTE: the logo has an ice hockey sticks and skates)

When I told everyone at work that I was moving home they did two things. 1. Per usual, asked me if I was going to miss the weather (not a big deal to be honest, I miss seasons) and 2. I got the normal “why would you want to move away?”… When I asked them if they lived anywhere else they look at me blankly and say “why would I want to do that?”

But now that we are not the only ones who hate San Diego, I wish everyone the best of luck getting out of the dirty infested hell hole.


Tom D said...

Dude Yeah SD sucks. But so does SF- I am from the bay area and I just want to remind you the grass is NOT always greener- San Francisco has some scenic beauty, but it is also disgusting and has WAY too many cracked out aggressive homeless types. It's not clean anymore and there are tons of people from other states who think they own the town. I now live in Chicago and NY and they are both heads and tails above SF. Just my 2 cents. Peace.

ryan the lion said...

so, i just saw that this august i received three comments on this blog post.

thank you all for your insight. i'm glad that i'm not the only one who observed these things about "america's finest city".

i have to say that one year after posting this i feel exactly the same. part of me has simply acclimated to the city, expecting all the things i hated so bad at the time of this posting, but all of me will always long for something different. and i still hate those stupid little stares i get when i say something mildly intelligent. in other words, i still hate san diego.

i'm glad the three of you could leave town and find nicer places. i've applied for my ph.d. at a place that i think will suit me much better, and we'll see how that goes. in the meantime i must suffer, but look forward to the change. cheers!

I hate San Diego said...
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Mark said...
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iloveflorida said...

OMG - I have found normal people in San Diego!!!

I moved to San Diego 10 years ago. Boy that was the BIGGEST mistake of my life. I consider myself pretty stupid to have moved from nice warm friendly, inexpensive, well run, no state income tax Florida to an overpriced, over rated, man made beachs and hairy palm tree San Diego...stupid, stupid, stupid me.

1. San Diego is not tropical, it is a desert. Palm trees are not native to SD they grow in a tropical region. Tropical also means there is high humidity, lots of rain, foliage is green and healthy (not dead and brown waiting for a breeze to blow by and catch it on fire) and the average temperature is above 80 degrees.

2. Talk about unfriendly people. If you so much as say hi to a local they wonder what you want. I have never had so many doors let go in my face by the locals with no manners. I've never had people walk into me before just because they had no clue as to their surrounding.

3. For a city that has soooo many colleges, it has the most ignorant local population. You are right when you said that people here never bother to better themselves, they are happy doing what they did 40 years ago, like driving their 1962 VW van with a Peace sign spray painted on the side and those fashionable tie dye shirts.

4. Apartments - has anybody really noticed that most apartments here (in the city of SD only) were built between 1920 & 1950, then none were built again until 2000. I personally have never lived in an apartment built in 1940 until I moved out here. In Florida they tear the old stuff down that contains lead and Asbestos. Every apartment I lived in was brand new, with central heat & air, a full size washer and dryer, a dishwasher, microwave, security system and beautiful landscaping, mutiple pools, so even had a 9 hole golf course ALL for $425 per month. So I've comprised by living standards down to a roof, four walls, and inside toilet for $1121 per month. It's a crap hole, by neighbor across the hall beats his wife on Friday nights so the Cops are always here. My neighbors downstairs are locals who were raised in a barn, they cannot close a door without slamming it, and or course they are deaf because they can't hear their TV without sharing with everyone around them. And of course far be it from me to say a word to the office for fear of retaliation from the "bullies".

BUT unfortunality I have a business here. I've worked very hard at setting up a bookkeeping service. And I have experienced some of the worst clients ever. It's hard to find clients here who give a hoot about their books. As long as they have money in the bank then their profitable.

And Narcissitic, I've never met so many people who have such a high opinion of themselves, who are so self centered and they feel like somebody owes them something. I haven't figured out what that something is, but when I find out I'll be sure to broadcast it. I've had clients empty out their bank accounts the day before I'm suppose to get a check. Oh and lying, no one seems to be able to deal with the truth out here.

San Diego has no class, it's not a vacation meca, it's not a high-tech bio-medical area(they are all moving to Florida 'cause San Diego's too expensive) it's beaches are disgusting and polluted, the cliffs from above and fall and kill you. And for a place that is so strick on it's environment why is there a sewage spill once a week so the beaches have to be closed. I heard one surfer being interviewed because he was surfing in an area that had been closed due to a raw sewage spill and his comment was "he just spits the turds out" now ladies how would you like someone like that showing up to take you out one night.

So I'm stuck here. If I can ever get enough money saved up to move back to Florida I will be one happy person.

I can put a sign on the back of my car that say's
"AMF San Diego"

shaylyn said...

I have lived in San diego all of my life just about everywhere in the county some things I can agree with you on but San Diego has its good points too but I'm on to San Fransisco next year and we'll just see how I like northern California

garrett said...

i cant believe im still alive living here. worst place in the country. cant wait to move up north again.

Bella said...

San Diego has the rudest, most ignorant people I have ever met, the city government is corrupt. I have been here for two years and it has been the worse time in my life.
I was brain dead when I moved here.
I want get out of here as soon as I can, before I commit suicide

Bella said...
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lizzy said...

I was born and raised here, but I have to admit that I hate San Diego. Though, hate is such a strong word and I may just say that I really dislike living here. I just moved back from living in San Francisco and boy do I miss it. I can't wait to move back. Yes, it's sunny here all year long, but that's it. I hate that you have to drive everywhere, there's no nightlife, and the arts and culture is very minimal. I am so bored here! I also hate the lack of coffee shops....why can't starbucks just go away.

Fishbelly said...

Yeah man, I feel ya. I grew up here, left in 2001, came back and left again, then came back 2 1/2 years ago and to be short about it…

San Diego will never change, and it will never change because no one here wants to change. I have several close friends here (in part because I grew up here with them) but every one of them has given up on themselves to surf, smoke weed, play frisbee golf, whatever. I long for culture and something to do at night that doesn’t involve bad techno and guys with shaved heads wearing polo shirts, or hipster/artist elitist kids with their PBR’s at $7 a pop. And as far as people being unfriendly I totally agree. On a whole I think people here are jaded because they stopped challenging themselves a long time back and stopped growing, yet never made that connection. Anyone who’s ever struggled with depression knows that the best way out is to stay productive and positive, not self-absorbed and lazy—so San Diego get off your ass already! And good luck calling someone on their shit out here--that turns into a fist-fight...

Glad you found a nice girl here—I visited Seattle for 2 days and found more interesting, down to earth women (and one special girl in particular) in that that time than I have EVER found in the last 2 years in San Diego—screw this Hollywood infection. I’ve never met soo many stuck-up superficial women with truly nothing to offer me. Even the musicians up there were genuinely interested in listening to a fan after the show, plus proud of their scene. Try talking to any band out here and see how fast they bail on you. The music scene here is almost the worst I’ve seen--which is the hardest part for me because I teach music for a living and long for the challenge of other professional musicians who don’t think they’re better than everyone else because they know a few bad blues licks they got off YouTube. In my efforts to find myself a teacher I’ve found no one with the exception of the occasional SDSU jazz snob that knows much of anything about his instrument; it’s sad, really. There are good players here but no scene to support them. I struggle to find students as well because everyone here is too lazy to learn the guitar, or too superficial to be creative in the first place. Several of my students who moved here from the east coast have told me that the living would be much better out there because the people are more interesting and therefore do more interesting things—like play instruments, and I’m hoping to find out shortly. It goes to show: no culture, no art.

It all seems like a bad dream, one big experiment in mediocrity, but it’s a big world and I’m sure there’s a place for all of us to fit in somewhere. Personally I’d like to grow, so bye San Diego!

marie said...

I hated San Diego I lived there for 10 years moving from Northern Cali.
I didn't make one good friend the whole time I lived there. It's the worst place I've ever lived. I will never go back! ick....

ramlaislam said...

i agree with all ur diego is the worst place on earth. I hate the people. i also hate the place and the schools. san diego sucks man....

Taylor said...

See ya...

nonsequitor415 said...

10 reasons I hate San Diego, huh?...
Whatever dude... San Diego is a great place to live. That said, I noticed that most people who have an issue with it are those who live in the Gay Area... I mean Bay... whatever.
I actually have lived in the bay for the past 20 years since being dragged here as a kid from Colorado, and this place sucks big time.
I lived in San Diego for a bit, and horribly regret that I ever moved... because I am dying to run back! The weather, unlike Frisco, is great... as are the women (also unlike Frisco). Plenty of parking; not everyone is packed in like sardines; the beaches are beautiful; and not everyone is so fucking in your face about shit--all unlike Frisco.
I don't know, to each his own... but I love that place, and I regret so much that I ever left.

Abashi76 said...
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Abashi76 said...

I hate San Diego, especially the monolithic gender roles. Everybody my age here thinks the same, especially the girls!

All the girls here loved to be slapped around by men, and everybody finds a woman slapping somebody the most offensive thing in the world.

Everybody my age also has a preference for men taking the nurturing roles and being massage therapists. I always see men holding hands with kids, never women. All the younger massage therapists are men. Everybody is extremely intolerant and hateful regarding different views about sex and gender roles and exceptions do not exist.

Everybody here hates anime also!

Andrew said...
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Andrew said...

Thank you for posting this blog. I was starting to wonder if I was the only one that hates San Diego this much! The people here are just so ignorant and vain... AND THEY'RE PROUD OF IT! I mean, there are ignorant people everywhere. But everywhere else there seems to be intelligent people peppered in here and there. In San Diego, it's like a 24/7 pot fest, and all I have is a fork. Don't get me wrong, I've made friends here, but whenever I try to talk about the outside world, books, art, or science, they always cut me off. They seem to think I'm trying to "act" smart, when I'm just trying to make conversation. Being here makes me think, "maybe this is why Einstein endorsed that bomb..." joking of course. But when you want to talk about the outside world, they look at you like you're the freak for even acknowledging that there is a world out side of San Diego! It's absurd! I've been to many, many countries and places all over the world, and I can honestly say I would rather live in a dirt poor 3'rd world country like Nepal or Morocco, than spend another day here... San Diego sucks!

I'm jealous of you, you get to leave <.<...

Gl and have fun!

Lazy John said...

I'm 45 and I've lived in San Diego most of my life. I agree with most of what you say. I plan to leave within the next few years myself if I can.

xavier7d said...

I've been living here in San Diego for 6 months or so now. The first thing I noticed was the rudeness of the majority of the people I have come in contact with. And what's up with the fake tan,ugg wearing, barbie doll clones with too much makeup on? Is that really a look here? (Gag) With the conceited attitude, those are some really attractive girls!(not)

I have met a few nice people here, but they are usually too few and far between. It seems most of the people living here are trying to be like everyone else around them, just go with the flow, no matter how wrong it is. And if you try to have a conversation about something that actually matters in life, they seem confused, just keep it shallow and you're ok I guess.

I lived here in La Jolla years ago, and met quite a few very nice people. Even met an awesome girl here!, not sure what happened, but it doesn't seem nearly as friendly as it did then.

Most of the guys here seem like real lying "dogs", no respect for women in general, or integrity, as well as disrespect towards everyone else. Enough said.

I continue to try to find "normal" people here to hang out with, but not much luck so far. I moved here from Los Angeles hoping it would be better, but now I miss LA. Being near the beach is great, just not when it is overrun by jerks. It's hard to enjoy a beautiful house when it is infested with cockroaches...

Shawn said...

Finally, I do not feel like I left San Diego for all the wrong reasons. I actually felt like a failure because I just could not make it work. I felt like when I was even a little agressive in trying to make friends, I was intruding on their complacent lives. I have a friend that moved there 20 years ago from Los Angeles and he has completely changed into selfish and rude MF who doesn't own a mirror.

calilove said...

wow. love this topic because i hate san diego too. i've lived here for almost 15 years, and i can't really take another day. i'm originally from los angeles (yes, it's southern california, but it's much different!). i came down here after having lived in the midwest and northern california for brief spells (5 years each). i didin't ant to raise my young son in l.a. because it wasn't safe at the time and i didn't want him to be ruined by the hollywood/celebrity-obsessed culture, so i came down here. he's now off to college (couldn't wait to leave san diego as he feels the same way you do), and now i'm ready to go. as a black female, most of my friends in san diego were new york transplants who left because of the redevelopment/gentrification craze a few years back. they became priced out of this "finest city". i haven't clicked with any of the black community here because, as you mentioned, people seem stuck in mediocrity here--it's very unfortunate. it has also started to become los angeles circa 1985. the irony is that l.a. has cleaned up its act and is now a thriving, progressive metropolis once again.

san diego and san diegans suck for the most part, and i'm actively looking for work up in l.a. county so i can be closer to my family and away from the drunken republican, stunted, militaristic, xenophobia that is san diego county. thanks for sharing your thoughts with the rest of us out here who can't wait to escape! good luck to everyone who is in the process of leaving this dying city!

26EverMore said...

Me: "17 + 7 equals 24. We will have 14 left if we take away 10."

Male Colleague: "I thought 17 + 7 equals 16, and that we were going to take away 6? So, we'll have 10 left."

L.A. Me: "NO!!! 17 + 7 equals 24 because 7 + 7 equals 14, plus 10 (17 = 10 + 7) equals 24. 24 minus 14 leaves 10. You with me?"

S.D. Me: "Exactly, you're absolutely right. My mistake."

26EverMore said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

You are a douchebag and a idiot that has not traveled much past whatever trailer trash area you came from. But hey I guess every moron with access to the net can post idiocy. So have fun deleting my post like you deleted every other post that disagreed with you. Typical small minded liberal moron. Have fun not finding decent employment @sshole.

ryan the lion said...

While I sincerely appreciate every comment left here, I don't usually reply directly to them. But I just want to clear up a few things that are factually incorrect in this latest comment.

First, I'm not sure what gives the commenter the idea that I delete comments that disagree with me. I've never deleted a single comment, as you can see by simply reviewing the comments here. The only one that says "...has been removed by a blog administrator" was actually spam. Any other removed comments were removed by the posting parties. In fact, a simple review of the comments will show some that disagree with my assessment. So, that charge is simply not correct.

Second, I get the feeling that you didn't even read the post, since you didn't address any content in your comment. "Typical small minded liberal moron" doesn't describe me or anything in this post. In self-defense, I am certainly not an "idiot", either. I'm completely befuddled as to where "Have fun not finding decent employment @sshole" came from.

Now that I'm writing this, I suspect your post was spam. Eh. Oh well, not really worth more time than that.

Lost in Translation said...

I can't agree more about your reasoning. Me and my girlfriend moved here 3 months ago from Buffalo NY. I can't get over how much there is a lack of a sense of community and disregard for your fellow man! My girlfriend decided to take her scooter to work from the sprinter. We figured it might save on gas. After her shift she scooted across the street to the sprinter with the little man on the sign was blinking so that she had the right of way to walk. As she's crossing, a car decides its a good idea to inch up to her so they can make a turn. Another car behind the driver drove up pretty fast behind them so that the first car had to gun it so they didn't get hit from behind. My girlfriend jumped off her scooter before she got hit as they ran over her scooter. She laid sprawled on the pavement just before the side walk, legs scraped and bleeding. Did anyone stop to they did not. I'm appauled at the selfinshness of this area. I've never seen such rudeness and lack of manors in my life. Not only that, try to have somewhat of an intelligent conversation with someone. They look at you like you're talking quantum physics. They charge you for everything. You can't even go to a state park without having to pay some kind of fee, same goes for festivals, beaches, etc. San Diego is a clear indication of coorporate greed. Has anyone been to Albertsons! This place certainly needs an etiquette lesson!

Renee said...

After 6 1/2 years in San Diego, we're going back to Chicago. Can't wait to have an intelligent conversation again... But I will miss the ocean and the sun.

Renee said...

After 7 years in San Diego, I'm moving back to Chicago. Can't wait to have an intelligent conversation and diverse friends again. But I will miss the sun and the ocean. I can always visit Santa Monica instead!!!

bmcclean1 said...

I agree - San Diego does SUCK! I live in New York City and I am dating someone (long distance) who is in the military there. I visited him 3 times last year (2011) and once so far this year (2012) and each and every time I try to love the place. It just fails so miserably - I can’t believe it. I've never felt this way about any place else - there is just something so intrinsically wrong with this place - the people, the cold nasty beaches, the cold dirty pacific etc...

Another misconception about San Diego is the weather – that its always so great. Totally NOT true... the weather sucks - it's usually always cold (hardly ever over 62 degrees) (esp. in mornings and evenings), windy and rainy (albeit on and off throughout most days). You constantly have to wear (or bring) sweatshirts and outerwear b/c the temps can drop fast.

It's also such a driving city (but I will say MOST American cities are like this - so it's not uniquely a San Diego derogatory trait). If you walk two blocks on a sidewalk in any of its’ neighborhoods you feel like a homeless transient just for doing so. I totally felt insecure and awkward walking around - which is terrible and so not like NYC. NYC is such a walking city and it's great to be able to do it without any odd feelings.

Another thing are all the surfer bro dudes - totally gross and annoying - it's incomprehendable how brain dead these idiots are - and totally not friendly (no one really is there).

I will play the devil's advocate to - some pros I found in SD ironically enough is their public transit stem (MTS), I've had some good experiences taking the buses and even better ones taking the trolleys. But watch out for the entire white trash bum homeless surf rat population (majority are white with long hair leather skin, stinking like alcohol past their 40s). There are also whole streets in downtown that are "tent cities" housing thousands of homeless people - never seen anything like it in my life.

I was overly cruel regarding the beaches - they are not ugly by any way shape or form... it's just that they are normally COLD, windy and the sand is not the nicest (compared to beaches in Florida or even NY)!

The only city worse then this (that I lived in for a short time) was Orlando. That’s a whole different story.

Reggie said...

To be honest, your reasons for hating San Diego seem petty. A lack a of waterless urinals? If this is amongst your greatest tribulations living there, man, I would say your life sounds pretty damn good.

I grew up in Philadelphia. You talk about a complacent, superficial, shithole with political corruption, filth, and some of the meanest people you would ever have the misfortune of working/living near. Trust me, SD ain't got nothing on us.

Spend a year living out here and I guarantee, you would kiss the ground the moment you came back to San Diego.

ryan the lion said...

I'm surprised I'm still getting comments on this post, 5 years after I wrote it...

If I wrote it again now, sure, I'd probably change a few things and use different examples. I might even change any number of the reasons I listed. For the most part, though, I could stand by the general ideas communicated here.

Reggie, the waterless urinals example seems a bit strange to me now, and I'm not sure why I used that particular example; the general idea behind that number, though, was that SD cares very little about environmental issues. Having lived in several cities around the globe, I know that relatively speaking, SD's environment is not high on many people's list of concerns.

I think what's important in that post is not so much the particular examples I used but the numbered reasons. Don't get hung up on the examples.

And 5 years later, having recently visited San Diego from my current Seattle, I can affirm that I still very much hate that city. To suggest as you do, Reggie, that there is a common experience of the city (e.g., "If you think SD is bad, you should visit X,Y,Z cities") is faulty - that's why the post is titled 10 reasons I hate San Diego. You might have reasons you like SD or hate Philly, but that does not really mean that I'll share them with you. Just sayin'...

Reggie said...

I just happened on your post today; did not realize it was written so long ago. SD made quite an impression upon me. I am actually considering relocating there. To be quite honest, this was one of the few negative postings I found about the city. I may not agree with your reasons, but I do appreciate the different perspective. It gives newbies like me something to think about. I hope you found what you were looking for in Seattle. Good luck, brother.

Reggie said...

Btw - Heaven or Las Vegas by the Cocteau Twins is one of my all time favorites. Ice Blink Luck. What a great song.

AGuy said...

Reggie - DON'T RELOCATE HERE!! Okay, maybe if you already have some friends and a job set up here, by all means try it out for yourself. I can tell you that a few years back, I felt the same way you do now. I was living in the northeast (Boston - not as rough as Philly but pretty close) and after coming here on vacation one autumn, I couldn't stop thinking about the place. I had loads of fun; not to mention the sand, the sun, the girls, the scenery.. I just couldn't get it out of my mind. I visited SD multiple times after that over the course of a couple of years and eventually decided to move here to live in "greener pastures". Boy, was that a mistake. Not that I regret the experience of it all, but if I could go back in time I'd stop myself from doing it. The weather, despite what you may think, does get bland and boring after a while, which is a perfect reflection of the people here. The locals all seem to have stopped learning at a junior high level and simply don't appear to want to. In fact, they don't seem to want to do anything except get high/drunk, listen to Sublime and go to the beach. The only intelligent conversations I've had here have been with people from the northwest or others from the northeast. Case in point: I was watching a show on Discovery about forensic pathology one evening when my SD-local craigslist roommate came home. He watched about two minutes of the show and remarked "Man, this show is stupid. Science stuff is boring." and proceeded to go into his room to watch the 'Real World' (yes, the San Diego one). The surfer-bro, tribal tattoo machismo types are everywhere. The locals girls aren't much better either. In my experience they're completely shallow and pretty stupid to boot. The only girls I've made any sort of real connection with here have been from, once again, the northeast and the northwest. If you're into music and the arts, forget about it - both scenes are barely existent here. The nightlife is decent in North Park, but that's about it. Bars and clubs in other areas of the city are overrun by the aforementioned bro types and drunken douche bag Navy dudes looking to let loose. The food here is nothing to write home about either. I love Mexican food, and there are some amazing spots for that, but that's about it. Unless you want to drop a pretty penny at the tourist spots, expect mediocre dining at best. It took me 6 months to find decent pizza in this city. The economy here is pretty bad, and the job market reflects it. Unless you have a specialized degree or a trust fund, be prepared to live on 25-35K per year if you can even get a job. It took me 5 months to find a job here, only to get laid off 4 months later when the company moved out of state to save money (the taxes and regulations are insane) and ditched about 80% of it's employees in the process. Even my waitress and bartender friends have a hard time finding work here. There is barely a middle class, and the middle class that is left here seems like it's hanging on for dear life. I could go on and on, but I digress. All that said, there are some things that I still love about this city, but they're the same things I loved about it when I was just a visitor - the beaches, the scenery, and the near-constant comfortable temperatures. The weed is pretty damn good too (if you're into that), but I'll gladly trade all of that back in for a better economy, smart people, a decent nightlife, good food, and seasons. I can't wait to move back to Boston next month!!

Nyle said...

I agree. San Diego is a black hole full of the most vapid people you'll ever meet.

They seemingly come from all over and congregate into this one location.

I'll be LA bound within a year if all goes well.

lrm said...

thank god for this post-i know it's 5 yrs old, but i've been here 10 years and hated it the whole time-and tonight was the night i had to google 'i hate san diego' to get some company. Just. can't. take. it. anymore.
All the reasons you all have listed-well, saves me from having to type them.
Yes, I think it's particularly tough when you are from the NE or a place where ppl read books or learned to write in school. Though to be fair, my spouse is a SD native, and the place has indeed changed for the worse...

Well, i currently live amongst many first generation immigrants in an upscale area with great schools for the family-and it still sucks. Doesn't matter which area of the city you are in-vapid, no more than 2 sentences each way for an exchange with someone, and absolutely no actual involvement with the concept of citizen involvement....very little. Unless you drive to People's co-op.

lrm said...

To add: I've also lived in CO, MT, San Francisco-and so yea, SD is not my cup of tea; it's 'nice' which is 'nice' for some people and I respect that.
Everyone is 'nice'-the weather, the food [mediocre at best], the people are 'nice'-ie, the ones who are not ignoring you or wondering if you are checking them out b/c you glanced at them-and this is even worse women to women-like they want to see if you've had enhancements and are you competition, and then they look quickly away as though they were not looking.
Jr. High for sure-though High School also fits. It's a giant High School here in SD.
I've been trying to leave for years-I think we do need a support group, or an online prayer group to get those of us who really don't belong here, the h*ll out.

Sure, i'm glad I'm not in x, y or z location in the world, but that is a small solace!

lrm said...

oh sorry have to say one more thing: my spouse received a 'gold star' as work recently, yes, jr. high right? And you know what he did to deserve that? He HELD OPEN A DOOR FOR SOMEONE CARRYING LARGE BOXES.
He may have even done this more than once! shock. gasp.
He is a SD native, and he was also appalled at the lowered standards of human decency here.
But hey, the person who reported his 'good' deed did good, since he got some free movie tix. out of the deal.

I LOVE when I visit somewhere-such as CO recently-where people actually talk in full sentences and don't text the majority of their conversations. Okay, I'll stop now. Thanks.

Cheryl Meril said...

I've been told by someone very familiar with the San Diego Court system Bonnie Russell at that San Diego's the most comfortable with its corruption of any city in the United States."

They find their corruption there "comforting" and self assuring I'm sure.

Andrea said...

Be it five years too late, and the result of a desperate Google search of "I hate San Diego", I too am glad I "found" you all. As a well-traveled and even better educated woman, I find it depressing to deal with the droves of ignorami I encounter on a daily basis. At first I thought it was me, so I did what I always do, 1. Chin up, 2. Get out of the house and 3. Get busy volunteering and trying to socialize. As a bona fide member of about 5 volunteer/women's orgs, I can honestly say, these people are NOT interested in friendship, genuine connections, conversations of substance, or even good food or culture. Frankly, I am at my wits end! As a former resident of the greatest city in the USA (that would be NYC, by the way), I would give my left something to go back there and just be amongst normal people who ignore you with a purpose, but still have the common decency to help you out should the need arise. Where do those of you who hate this live? Perhaps we should sincerely have a MeetUp group? I would be glad to start it, I'll be back in a week to check the replies. Stay strong!!! ;-)

Mariest said...

I read an article when I lived there, it said the suicide rate is high in San Diego and while I was reading I thought to myself, I can understand why. Unfortunately I now live in Sacramento (Scumento). It's gotten worse (the roads are terrible, no jobs and more crime) since I left in 97, but at least people are a little more friendlier and down to earth here. MeetUp group? It would be fun!

TXB78 said...

Please please start a Meetup group!! Honest to God I've been here for over 8 years (moved out here for a boyfriend at the time and we've since broken up 6 years ago) and have never been so unhappy in my life! I only stuck around because I couldn't afford to move back to Connecticut and then my mom ended up moving out here to be closer to me. I have barely made a real decent friend who isn't FAKE or flakey beyond belief and the real friends I've made (who, BTW are not SD natives) ended up all moving away from here. It's too expensive and the people just have this disgusting sense of entitlement. I've lived in CT, NY, L.A. and this is most depressing time of my life. My boyfriend (met him 3 yrs ago here - he's from TX) and I are saving like crazy to move to Austin, TX. Grass may not be greener there, who knows, but to hear a "thank you" if I hold a door for someone or a car letting me into a lane and not getting run off the road trying to get on the freeway -- I'll take that ANY DAY over the selfish a-holes here. I'll give up this no change of season blah same-weather-every-friggin-day just to get away from these depressing, un-intelligent, ADD-riddled, lazy mother-effering fake people here!!
If someone starts a Meetup I'll be there with bells on!! PLEEEEEASE!! :)
(I chuckled at the handful of people that Googled "I hate San Diego" like I just did - awesome!!)

Cheryl Meril said...

It seems we need an "Escape from San Diego" movie. We need some great screenwriting for this and to make sure to interview all those who posted here as well.

noname said...

It seems that I'm also a bit late but I too found this blog as a result of googling "I hate San Diego."

I really hate this place and went over the character count so I divided my story into multiple sections.

I moved here a little over 2 years ago to go back to school because I lost my job in the SF bay area. I have family that live down here and to hear them talk about it, I was told that San Diego was the closest thing to heaven that you could find on earth. Of course, every place that you move to has a honeymoon phase but that phase is definitely over and I have to say that outside of the south or the midwest, I can't think of a whole lot of places that I would dislike living as much as San Diego.

I can't even begin to tell you how much I agree with almost everything in the original post. Particularly, I notice the complacency more than anything else. When I moved here, I couldn't believe how many people had never lived outside of San Diego county. Some had never even left the city where they grew up. Almost all of them think that San Diego is the greatest place on earth. When I talk to some of these people, I feel like I'm slamming my head into a brick wall. Because of how much I hate it here, I will sometimes ask people what they think is so great about San Diego. I figured that maybe there is something that I am missing. Astonishingly, most of them don't have much to say about it. One girl that I talked to said that she had never lived anywhere else but she didn't want to move because she just couldn't imagine anything better. I wanted to scream but I held it in. It almost seems like the same sort of mentality that people have that are living under a dictatorship. Sure, its a horrible place to be but its home and there is no frame of reference for anything different.

When I tell people that I want to move back to the bay area, they look at me like I have 3 heads. They can't seem to understand why I want to leave. I found a couple people who had been to San Francisco. Both of them said that they didn't like it. One said that they didn't like it because they said that there was nothing to do (as it turns out, this person had only spent a few hours there while on the way to somewhere else).

Well, I have been here longer than a couple of hours... more like a couple of years and there is far less to do here than there is in SF. Unless you really like going to the beach or are really into craft beers, San Diego is a pretty boring place. Don't get me wrong, I love the beach and craft IPAs as much as anyone but there is more to life than getting skin cancer and growing a beer belly.

noname said...

Speaking of entertainment, I have to say that San Diego sports fans are the most hypocritical bunch you will ever meet in your life. Being a Raider fan, I fully expected to experience some trash talk. I'm fine with that. But some of these people take it way too far. The funny/sad thing is that all the Charger fans talk about how horrible all of the Raider fans are because we are rude/violent/criminals/etc. Meanwhile, I have seen Charger fans vandalize cars of the opposing team's fans on a regular basis as well as going WAY beyond normal football trash talk. It is commonplace for them to do things like insult your family if you happen to be wearing silver and black. As I said, I'm all for trash talk as long as it stays talk and stays about football.

I completely understand about the Mexican culture thing as well. I'm not sure how to say this without coming off as being racist but here goes: I am fine with having some level of Latin culture but I also want to live somewhere that at least closely resembles American culture. I feel like I live in Mexico more than I do America. This goes way beyond being respectful of Mexican culture. Mexico has completely taken over San Diego. There are some cities in San Diego county that it is next to impossible to find a job unless you speak Spanish. Where I live, the neighbors will be blasting Mariachi music at all hours of the night. I'm sorry but that goes way beyond being respectful of other cultures.

Another thing that I noticed about San Diego is the culture of criminality and the lack of respect for peoples' property. I live in a pretty okay area by San Diego standards but in the two years that I have lived here, I have been a victim of crime probably six times as often as I was in the 22 years that I lived in the bay area. People on a general basis don't respect the property/space of others. People in San Diego let their dogs bark constantly for hours and often let them run around the neighborhood unsupervised to leave dog poop of all sizes on my lawn. There seems to be an attitude of "if you can get away with it, do it." Sorry, I'm really not into that.

The military complex drives me nuts too. Okay, thats great that we have a lot of military and I'm sure that it is a difficult job for the entire family but I really despise that alpha male mentality that permeates the military. Honestly, some of the biggest d-bags that I have met in my life have been Marines. I have met a few good ones here and there too. I respect good people regardless of what career path they choose to take. Like what was mentioned in the original post, I see intelligence as a more beneficial trait to society than strength/endurance. If I were to say that to some people in San Diego, it could cause a riot.

Maybe I'm a bit pretentious but I also like being able to buy nice things. I hate shopping at Walmart for a number of reasons but mainly I like to buy quality products that look good and will last rather than continuously replace cheap stuff. Good luck finding anything high quality in San Diego. If it isn't rock bottom priced garbage, nobody here will buy it and people like me have to do their shopping a couple of times per year when we travel.

noname said...

People in San Diego are cheap in every aspect of their life, including with food. Outside of the occasional In n Out Burger and Chipotle, I hate fast food (those two establishments are definitely on the better end of fast food though). In San Diego, people can't get enough fast food. There was a Jack in the Box that opened down the street from me and I swear it was a community event. Where is the same enthusiasm for organic produce that isn't loaded with chemicals and high fructose corn syrup? Not to be found in San Diego... thats for sure.

I could go on for pages about why this place sucks and why people who say that it is great are just too ignorant to know any better. I'm sure some of it comes down to personal preference. I don't really care for constant sunshine and actually enjoy a bit of rain every now and then (that is quite an unusual trait in San Diego).

Overall, I suppose it could be worse. I could be living in some redneck state like Texas or Kentucky or something but I'm getting out of here the first chance I get.

Anyone reading this who is contemplating moving here: don't. The grass is not greener on the other side... and not just because San Diego is a desert where nothing living survives.

Cheryl Meril said...

WE need a book with comments such as these about what people from the outside think of San Diego.

Aleah Haugland said...

i stumbled upon this because i have been sitting at my house the last two days with nothing to do...i randomly typed..."I hate San Diego" in google out of boredom. All of your reasons are very true, to me. I have been here 6 months, and I hate it. People really are unintelligent and they find any one that wants to converse about life, family, or education very dull and weird. I am very educated and I care a lot about becoming close to friends and family. It seems as though I am treated as being weird or stupid because of this. I have found it connecting with people, because in fact, my problem is that I am trying to connect. I look around and I am very lonely. I live with my room mate, who is from Illinois, like myself, and he has tons of friends. but he is one of those people that hate emotions, and fits in with these people....his best friends are just a bunch of drunks that only come around to party. I have sat with them for hours and have never heard a connected or passionate conversation.
ALong with that, I go to school with a bunch of b****es. They are all judgmental and stupid. women act like 16 year olds well up into their 30s here.I seriously have never met a more immature population than San Diego.
As for recreational activities; BARS. and they are all over priced, loud, and full of dumb women and even dumber men. The only decent people i have ever met, ironically, are not from San Diego. When I meet people that are from here, they ask me how i like it here, with the dumbest look on their they are waiting for the absolute orgasm of satisfaction of me saying "I love your city."
I noticed you mentioned the military. What you do not realize is that even the military hates it here. I am married Navy....He hates it. He hates the boisterous command here. There is no unity here, and every one is only after everyone else's throats. We have made zero friends. Our friends that left the last station, in Guam, and moved here are the only ones we talk to. They hate it too.
North park is my favorite place to go and thats just to walk around and look at a few shops.
Apartments are over priced every where for heaps of crap living. We are maybe going to spain or italy in 3.5 years and the rent over there is 500-1200 a month for a furnished, 1-2 bedroom home with an ocean view, and blacony, with swimming pools....and the houses at that price would be 3000+ here. really??? to live in a great place in italy or spain is that cheap?? wow. screw this place. i am never coming back.
the only comment i saw that i do not agree with is the one where the lady said she has visited here a few times. really, lady? please dont base an opinion on visits...
the weather here is never rainy until the winter weathers. It hasnt rained here in months, except for a sprinkle. spring is beautiful with 70 degree weather all the way up until july. Night times are chilly, but bearable. Winter is no lower than 40. that is not cold at all. And as for the "I feel like a homeless person when I walk" comment....what? haha A lot of people walk here. Nobody thinks a thing about it. Sometimes it is natural to have to walk a little even when driving. We have a lot of parking garages. traffic is not bad here so we dont have to take taxis a lot, like you do in NY. We park and walk a ways. grow up.

TXB78 said...

Would anyone be up for a "I hate San Diego" Meetup? Not just to vent but even to discuss things that may actually be positive about this place. I don't know about anyone else on this post but it's been challenging trying not to lose my mind here waiting until the day I get to move away for good (which is in the works)and I tend to focus more on the negative about San Diego. It's hard not to when there are so many things that just suck about this place. Sometimes I feel like I'm the only one that feels this way when I'm surrounded by plastic, materialistic airheads that think this place is paradise.
Just wanted to throw it out there like Andrea did in case anyone was interested. :)

Unknown said...

I'm up for such a meetup group. I think that we should all get together and watch "Idiocracy", a film written and produced by Mike Judge. He's the creator of Beavis and Butthead, and has his bachelor's degree (in physics, no less) from UCSD. The film reflects a lot of the angst that we feel about the airheads and flakes we're surrounded by in San Diego. As stupid as the characters are, the plotline and movie is genius, and provides instant empathy for us all. If anything, it's a conversation starter, and hopefully, a way to help us bond.

What 'crime' has brought you guys to San Diego? I'm in because I'm doing time as a research associate...hehe. It kinda feels like we're doing time here, doesn't it? Well, let's do many times with different meetup events. I'm pretty sure the group will have a big following.

So, TXB78, and everyone else, let's get the ball rolling!!!

Nancy said...
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Nancy said...

San Diego has no soul. Been here 3 years fro Colorado, well-educated, good job, live in the sweet spot of North County. Not a day goes by that I don't want to go screaming out of here. MeetUp would be a welcome outlet.

TXB78 said...

@Unknown - Funny you should suggest that movie "Idiocracy" as my BF and I just watched it a few weeks ago and I said to him "oh my god..those people remind me of the people here!!!"
I moved out here for a guy. I visited him 6 times here before moving and every time I visited him I felt a sense of dread as I just didn't like it here at all. Finally had to decide if he was worth moving for and he was. We just ended up drifting apart mainly because I couldn't get over how much I hated it here and he loved it. Needless to say a year later we broke up and remained friends but he moved back to NY and I ended up meeting someone new a couple of years later. We're both saving our pennies to get the hell out of here so we can move to Austin! The waiting game has been torture on me though. 8.5 years I've been here and everyday has been a challenge not to go insane.

So as far as a meetup is concerned...what area does everyone live (without giving out your exact location, of course)? I would think we should try and meet somewhere in the middle since the cities/towns are so far apart from each other. I live in North County coastal (not too far from Del Mar/Cardiff/Solana area).

Unknown said...

@TXB78...Perfect!!! I thought it was a great movie as well.

I originally wanted to move up to Northern California, both for a guy and to find a job there. However, the guy wasn't worth it after all, and I got a job here first. Love or hatred of San Diego is a legit dealbreaker for relationships :P. But, there HAVE to be eligible people out here who share my empathy for this place...

8.5 years, huh? You should have a badge or some award for that. I've been here almost 2 years, and, um, can't take it much longer...I will if I have to, and am trying my darnest to pursue avenues of happiness, but it feels like everything I do feels the same and booooooring.

I'm in North County, near Miramar.

TXB78 said...

Waiting to see if there's more interest in a meetup and then go from there. :)

Emma Mackenzie said...

I've lived here majority of my life (i'm fourteen) and I hate it as much as the rest of you do. Being a Freshman, I can see where you're coming from with the intelligence rate; I know people in the ninth grade and older that still can't even read.
And everything here costs something. My mother is from NYC, and when we go there i'm always blown away by how so many things are free. Honestly, i'd never actually seen a park before we went there. Because parks are too much money to take care of, I guess.
And also, people think of SD as a beach scene? The water is FREEZING. You can't stay in for more than thirty minutes without turning blue.
And with the drugs, it's understandable; there are so many cartel families out here. Majority of my peers from Middle School (BTW, if you say Junior High out here people look at you funny and ask if you mean Middle. Including adults.) were cartel kids, and got all kinds of drugs from their parents and sold them in school.
And also, in the schools, we are ranked 30th in education, which shows maybe, JUST maybe, laying off teachers left and right isn't the best thing to do. And class sizes are crazy huge; I had an algebra class with 53 students in the classroom, and it wasn't a big room either. And the schools don't care what goes down inside, as long as they make a buck off of it. I was raped in the sixth grade, as well as another girl, by this one kid and we told the principal and he said he couldn't expel him because he was a 4.0 student; bottom line, he made the school look better and got mr principal the money he wanted, so he refused to expel the kid. He only did so when we threatened to sue.
And honestly, even in High School girls are crazy superficial. I've gone to other states and i've never seen so many buttcheeks falling out of little ripped up Hollister shorts. And like in Glee, the cheerleaders wear their uniforms around all the time. Hilarious.
And I honestly only have one true friend here. The rest literally meech off of me when their clique (oh yes it's very very cliquey here, even with the adults) isn't around, and the funny thing is they call each other B*tches as hello. Like i'll be walking to lunch and someone will call out 'Hey b*tch!' and i'm expected to turn around. Hell no.
And I open up doors for people, but i've never had anyone open a door for me. And instead of saying thank you or anything they just walk on through. And don't give me a second look.
Also, with the superficiality, watch the news. Not one girl on there has a natural look. My mother and I were talking about this yesterday, wondering how many plastic surgeries do you have to have in order to get the job as the weather girl?
And how low/tight does your shirt have to be?
It's sad, really, and I can't wait until we can get out of here (bound by divorce ._. we can't even go on vacation).
Deuces, as the surfers say. I'm bouncin'.
Ugh stupid people....

over this town said...

Did anyone ever start a meetup group? I need an outlet with some people that understand why I know that San Diego sucks! I grew up as a military brat and lived all over the world so I've seen a lot of different places and experienced many types of cultures. San Diego is truly overrated, overpriced and filled with the most self-centered, selfish, malicious people I've ever encountered. There is no respect or common courtesy for your fellow neighbor or human beings in general. Everyone is "in it for themselves" and completely shallow when it comes to what life is really about. I have my sights on Colorado and cannot wait for my current apartment lease to be up in May.

TXB78 said...

No one has started one yet. I would but I'm so jaded by this bullsh*t city and have been flaked on WAY too many times to even have the energy to start a meetup. :( It's sad because I'm not a flake and where I'm not saying anyone that has posted on here would be a flake.. I still don't have faith in anyone ever anymore. This place has sucked the life out of me and I've all but given up on "meeting up" with people thinking they are actually going to show. If someone here starts one I would DEFINITELY go!!
Hey, "OVER THIS TOWN" - What area of San Diego do you live in?
I can't wait to get the hell out of here! 2013 I'm hoping the move to Austin and start new. These people are selfish a-holes that make me sick to my stomach that I breathe the same air as them. I'm embarrassed to tell people I live here! Is anyone up for starting a Meetup?

over this town said...
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over this town said...
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over this town said...
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over this town said...

I know exactly how you feel. I haven't made one "real" friend since moving out here almost 3 years ago. The people seem so content with having acquaintances and no one really cares to sincerely get to know who you are as an individual. I'm living in the San Diego/La Mesa area but was in the Mission Valley area for the last 2 years. One of my pet peevs is flakey people. There's something wrong with a person when they can't/don't follow through with what they say they're going to do. Are you moving to Austin in 2013? I have a friend that moved back there from San Diego, after she got married and hasn't looked back since.

over this town said...

I am visiting family back in Atlanta for Christmas and I cannot wait to get out of San Diego even just for that week of vacation. It's refreshing to go to another city and then be even more validated when you come back to San Diego, that it's truly overrated and overpriced. I don't even feel like it's the holidays because of the bubble of fake weather they live in out here! It's a nice place to visit if you want a beach vacation spot but I'd never recommend anyone live here.

noname said...

I'm going back home to the bay area in January. I can't wait. Even better, I think I am finally going to move back in about 6 months. Good thing too because my car got broken into AGAIN last night. I think that makes about 4 times since I moved here. That, coupled with all of the times that these subhumans have broken into my garage and stolen stuff, it seems like half of the people who live here are criminals. I have to get out of here. I can't live like this anymore.

stokelycalm said...

I'm surprised no. 1 wasn't materialism. San Diego is the most materialistic city I've lived in, and though probably not comparable to Vegas or NYC, it's still very materialistic in its own respect. The people here all believe in those get-rich-quick schemes and all judge you by how much money you appear to have. And appear is the keyword because MONEY SERIOUSLY TALKS in san diego. People don't care if you're generally a nice person or you're educated and have insight to offer on a topic. Money is what completely defines you in this city. And I can see exactly why: you have so many districts/communities (gas lamp district, college area, la jolla, mira mesa) that are so extravagantly luxurious, the materialistic ideals are almost contagious here. I've lived here for 2 years and absolutely hated it. I have a pretty nice income now and recently got my Master's Degree here but really struggled at first. The question that I get the most is... how much does your job pay you? As if that's anybody's business, it's incredibly annoying how money is the sole factor that defines your level of respect in this stupid city.

ABC = Arthur B.Chaney said...

I am thinking about moving to SD this summer, but after reading this I am reconsidering it. I was also thinking Miami, the problem is I have seasonal depression and Chicago weather is killing me literally so I need a wonderful city to live in like Chicago but better weather.

stokelycalm said...

Coming from the Bay Area, I noticed a lot of bad things about San Diego. First, it's the worst of both worlds; like the bay area, the housing prices are excessive (particularly rent is out of control) while the typical wages don't pay nearly as well as the Bay Area (hence worst of both worlds). Secondly, everybody is too much like each other - superficial, materialistic and socially/politically oblivious to the important matters at hand. Nobody here couldn't care less about the Syrian Civil War or even the City Budget failing all types of fiscal goals, but bring up Jersey Shore or Keeping up with the Kardashians and you will find San Diegans interest at heart. It's really a joke how depressing this city is. Yes, the women are hot and the weather is great but that's about it. The sports team all sucks (soon to be the L.A. Chargers) and the Padres have been an investment gone bad. The city budget has so many holes that giving out so many bogus traffic tickets doesn't quite meet that goal. The transportation system is horrible, you pretty much need a car. The city is very expensive to live in and for a huge metropolitan city (1.3 mill), there is virtually no middle class, or at least a diminishing middle class. There is only some very rich people and a lot of poor people, calling it China might be a stretch but that really may not be too far-fetched. The minimum wage is $8.00/hour but never has income to wealth been so disproportionate - excessive local taxes hinder the higher incomes and make life unaffordable for the lower class. But, more than anything, it's really the superficiality, materialism and oblivious lifestyle that can lead you into a culture shock, especially if you're from a city that completely differs from SD. It can be a hellhole miserable experience at first, it definitely takes time to adjust.

Mariest said...

Everything you said is true. I lived there for 10 years and even though I made decent pay working at a pharmaceutical company, I quickly realized there was no way I could ever afford a home there. I saw shacks going for $300,000.
I miss the weather and the ocean, but that's about it. It's sad that people there are so wrapped up in themselves, they couldn't care less about having a true friend.

Ryan Gray said...

I grew up in Buffalo NY my whole life . Moved to san diego 2 years ago for school. I too hate it. Cant agree more with the rest of you. Glad im not the only one. Back home people were rude, blunt, and guarded but they were true honest genuine whole hearted people with deep roots in friends family and environment . The people here are verry "nice", laid back, welcoming, good spirited people, with a shiny facade painted on their ugly superficial lives . they will stab you in the back and throw you under the bus if and when they can. Roots grow shallow in the desert. In buffalo we took pride in rust, didn't cover it in a plastic paint.....san diego truly the world of a plastic beach......signing off go f$&k yourself san diego

Ryan Gray said...

Fellow Buffalonian!

Cheryl Meril said...

Good points but listen, you need to use proper punctuation. The lack of following basic writing guidelines is very distracting and also discredits your complaints a bit since you appear to be the rebellious type. If you don't want to follow basic punctuation rules, e.g., proper initial caps, etc., maybe you shouldn't be using our medium of communication and stick with face to face exchanges to share your thoughts? People go to school for a reason and if you want to rebel against our system of writing, you probably should find another medium of expressing your thoughts otherwise you'll face criticism such as mine.

Cheryl Meril said...

Mark Dice's latest videos are exposing San Diegans' bubble world stupidity to the world.

Cheryl Meril said...

More videos exposing San Diegans, this one asks what year did Lee Harvey Oswald kill Jesus, or what year did Jesus die?

Cheryl Meril said...
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Cheryl Meril said...

Here's where San Diegans stand on. . .

noname said...

It is finally happening! I am leaving San Diego in one week! I can't wait!

Mariest said...

Good for you!!

Maeve Alleine said...

THANK YOU for posting this article- I truly thought I was completely alone in this. I am born/raised New York City, then lived in Scranton, PA for 9 years. ANYTHING, so I thought, was better than Scranton.

Well, I was wrong. At least in Pennsylvania nothing looks dead, dry and artificially kept alive. The water this area wastes is incredible!

Every point you've made, and many of your commenters are spot on. I can't wait to get the fook out of this boring, dead, superficial expensive place!

Maeve Alleine said...
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Maeve Alleine said...

I forgot to share the latest "cherry on top of my hatred of san diego sundae" by sharing this little experience I had this Saturday.

I will preface this with, my poor husband! His family is out here and he knows how miserable I am. I moved here with him so he could be with family and he loves it here. He has taken full responsibility for our living here and now is say he's done me a "great injustice" taking me away from my own family and the climate/geography/culture/fashion I love. I keep telling him I made my own decision but he's sweet and feels bad.

Anyway, so he found out about a "nice lake" from a friend of his at work. His friend caught a 5 lb bass there and he was excited because he knows I miss freshwater bodies of water.

So Saturday we drive there with our two dogs. I see that it's just, yet another, mud puddle dug in the desert. There was nothing green around it, in fact the earth and dead plants actually looked scorched! It was so depressing. I feel bad but I lost it. I just couldn't take looking at this horrible excuse for a "lake" anymore. My poor husband...he's trying to make me happy here but it's just impossible.

We drove home with me ranting about how bad it is here in tears and he was besides himself with sadness that he ever asked me to come out here.

I have set my sights on Seattle. There is nothing for me in the Northeast except memories and very severe winters that even I don't wish to live through anymore. Seattle seems to be a most excellent compromise. Anyone have anything to say about it?

Maeve Alleine said...

Oh I forget...while we were at the lake, not more than 5 minutes, my dog made a poo on the road going around the lake (it was Lake Murray, by the way).

I no sooner turned to pull a poobag out of my knapsack when this older guy with an ipod, in a loud embarrassing voice says at me, "YOU BETTER CLEAN THAT UP!"

I am SO TIRED of the judgmental, higher-than-thou, self righteous douchebags that live here. Seriously. Sick. And. Tired.

I seriously cannot wait to be out of here.

I yelled

Timothy Liao said...
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Timothy Liao said...
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Andy Jimenez said...

I was born and raised here my whole life in SD, I can't disagree with ya'll. I hate it here.

4. Teams.

San Diego has the most unloyal fans I have ever seeing!!! I'm an L.A fan and trust me ask any L.A fans that live here and SD fans get annoying only cheering for their teams when their winning. But when they loose they switch teams!

3. People

They're assholes! I already been through so many idiots I can't stand. They have a lot of attitudes and they start shit for any stupid reason. Like one time these assholes drug dealers were trying to steal from me and try to fight me in the streets because I was wearing an L.A hat. They think that their gangs are better then L.A. Pffff try to go too South Central, Compton, and East L.A or the Bay, they won't last a day!!!!

2. Mainstream

SD is a type of city that follows anything. I wanna be a leader not a follower. People follow and are stuck up to anything. The music here is dumb and hip hop here is dead.


Biggest reason I hate SD!!! Now for all you people that live outside of SD, If you're trying to look for a relationship, don't even bother haha. Trying to find a relationship like romeo and Juliet, Of course we all want one but if you ask me the percentage here to find a good relationship its 5% here. I promise you, Most girls here are so slutty, and really picky and stuck up! They have no respect for themselves, letting random people especially downtown people smacking their asses like what the hell is that?! I swear if I had girlfriend and saw a man smacking her ass, I'd beat the living hell out of him! They're assholes and end up dating dirtbags that cheat and never wanna move on and think suicidel haha.

Colt Ham said...

Main problem is that it is impossible to develop friendships in San Diego. Everyone is in it for themselves. Single men have a miserable time there as ugly women think they are hot and the better looking women are looking for men with millions of dollars. There is no depth to anything.

space heater said...

Well, I'm a transplant from Chicago...been living in the suburban hell that is Orange County for 7 years and miss the city. I'd been thinking downtown San Diego might be a good compromise, but from this post and all the comments it seems like you all have the exact same complains I do :(

pspees said...

I've lived here my whole fucking life and let me tell you, it's an evil place. There's no, absolutely no respect for hard working middle class people here. Socially it's a breeding ground for disaster. I can't wait to get the fuck out to some other place where people other than millionaires, their families, and ultra-corporate douchebaggery can flourish.

I thought no one else here saw this. I'm astounded at how patriotic people always are about this stagnant, superficial shithole and if you ever tell it like it is you're immediately branded a downer. Acting like "everything's chill" is essential to reputation and acceptance here, this explains the abundance of fakeness amongst the people. It's frequently hot as hell, the sun never quits (it's so intense it fucking hurts), and it's getting hotter/dryer every year.

Glad I found this blog, it gives me hope to know there are others who see through the hype and falseness that is San Diego (and Socal in general). Now I feel amongst friends! Go fuck yourself San Diego!

Arthur Baronov said...

You're absolutely correct my friend! The worst part about it, is that it's impossible to address any of these issues to the locals, even in the most tactful manner. I'm originally from Colorado and I can't wait to move back. They definitely show disgust for any form of individuality. It's just sickening, and sad how much these people are disconnected from one another.

Jared Stevens said...

I grew up in La Mesa, Nado, and near Little Italy. I spent my time skate boarding, surfing and playing street hockey. That said, I earned decent grades, so maybe I don't fit your stereotype so well. I'm about to graduate from UW (been here for 3 years, I'm graduating a year early), so we're both in Seattle as far as I can tell.

10. You're correct that the average San Diegan doesn't care about the environment as much as a Seattlite. We recycle, but we generally don't compost. That said, we aren't as bad as Texans.

9. My dad was in the Navy for 30 years, and I lived on the Seal Base for a few years. I can't think of a single person I knew who wanted to go to war in Iraq. They're just following orders. We support our troops in that we're thankful that they are willing to die for our country, but that doesn't mean we support the decision to go to war. I trust you see the difference I'm alluding to. The 'alpha male' culture you refer to is more or less valid. If that bothers you, Seattle is a better fit. I think surfer-bros are more genuine than the pseudo-intellectuals who read about Marx and Chomsky on wikipedia, but that's just my personal preference.

8. I never understood the appeal of cafes.. I just make coffee and tea at home. I'll leave you alone on this one :)

7. You're painting with an awfully wide brush. San Diegans may be more content and happy with life, but that doesn't mean we aren't ambitious. In August, I'm going to grad school in Tokyo to learn international finance and Japanese. I can't speak for everyone in the 619, but everyone I know has lofty goals. I know more stoned slackers with no ambition from Seattle.

6. We are vain, but so are Seattlites. We're vain in a different sense. We try to appear attractive and fun. Seattlites try to appear progressive and intelligent. I can't count the number of times I've seen friends up here bashfully admit that they weren't able to maintain a vegan diet, only to quickly stammer that they were trying again next week. The images we try to project are different, but every locale has their own societal pressure.

5. If you think there is no history in San Diego, clearly you've never been to Old Town. Besides which, what kind of cultural Mecca is Seattle? The Gum Wall and oddly designed museum next to the Space Needle are more recent than Cabrillo by several decades. I mean, dude.. Cabrillo landed in the 16th century. Also, you can attend annual Native American festivals in East County. Also, have you never been to the museums in Balboa park?

4. Again, I don't know what anecdotal evidence you are basing your opinion on, but people from Southern California are generally really outgoing and friendly. That's my experience at least.

3. It's only true if you don't know how to have fun without drinking. You can go outside every day of the year. SeaWorld, the San Diego Zoo, and Soak City are readily available, and Disneyland is only two hours away. And bro.. you're in Seattle. Everything closes here at 8 PM. Gaslamp > Capitol Hill.

2. San Diego's political climate depends on your neighborhood. Of the five representatives in congress from San Diego County, three are D and only two are R. Of all registered voters in the county, 35.8% are D, while 33.8% are R. We might not be as hard-core liberal as Frisco or Seattle, but we aren't all Republicans. I'm Third Way, if you're curious.

1. Yeah, you really need a car unless you live near the trolley station or are satisfied in your own 'city' within San Diego. Before I could drive, I never felt restricted in La Mesa, Coronado or Little Italy. They're very pedestrian friendly.

Anyway, sorry that San Diego doesn't cut it for you. It's perfect for me.

pspees said...

You sir fit right in here and cannot see outside the box. I appreciate your positive outlook but It's apparent that you're the SD type. Lofty goals and all.

Jared Stevens said...

Can't see outside the box? Bro, I've lived in San Diego most my life, but I've spent a total of eight years in South Carolina, Virginia, Vancouver and Seattle.

But yeah, it really comes down to what scene you identify with personally. I'm comfortable in San Diego, but that doesn't mean it's best for everyone. If you don't like it, bail. Less traffic for the rest of us :P

Wormwood said...

For those who don't understand this conversation, it is about hating San Diego. Therefore, those who write in defense of San Diego are proving why the rest of us do not like San Diego. Yes, some fight to their death to defend this pit, but the intention is not to converse or argue with you. It is typical of San Diegan's to argue, even fight, but intelligent conversation, nope. So, read the purpose of this conversation, and excuse yourself from being part of this conversation, be the bigger person. Heck, be a person that can just read and understand the intent of our words. Oh, but I keep forgetting San Diegans are too self involved to realize that this is simply a conversation that does not require their input. Yep, San Diego is a dump, with people that cannot understand why intelligence should ever be desired over, brute force. I think of it as, might makes right. Whatever you do, try not to offend or upset these people. However, it is easy to do, like shooting fish in a barrel.
The said part is San Diego may be a nice place if it were not for the huge group of ignorant people.
I teach adults, and these are very conceded, un knowledgeable people. They take these horrible self righteous attitudes home to their children, and kids act the same as mom and dad.
These people should be left to their nasty world, support it. Tell them how great it is and support them from moving and infesting the rest of the USA.
I have nightmares that this disgusting culture spread to the rest of the USA, I honestly hope it doesn't happen. It would be hell on Earth. Sartre wrote a play called, "Hell is Other People" very good play. It describes some of the hell I experienced in San Diego.
Pet your San Diegan on the head, support their ignorance, tell them their right, tell them their smart, tell them that staying in San Diego is the smart way to live life. And, get the hell out of this place ASAP.
People, we are not crazy, this place is bad for morale, the people are mentally ill here, get out before you suffer the consequences. They cannot close a door, they have to slam it because they need attention so bad here. They cannot, sit quietly, they must talk loud on their cell because they need attention. They cannot walk through the apartment complex without talking at the top of their lungs because they need attention. It is nasty, child like behavior and when that does not work, they will shut the door in your face, cut you off in traffic and go 20 mph under the speed limit, pretend you don't exist and try to walk over you on the side walk. They are not ok here, they are ill, just keep them contained to this region of the US. Maybe they have absorbed too much raw sewage, or there is something in the public water.

Home sick said...

I too am a fan of seasons and hospitality, seeing as that I'm coming from the South. These people are like robots you don't exist to's rude and too much sunshine isn't all that it's getting annoying and I've been here 1 week

Jared Stevens said...
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Jared Stevens said...

Wormwood, was "unknowledgeable" intentionally misspelled?

You are incorrect when you imply that disagreeing with your opinion necessarily means we are being shrill or fighting for the sake of being brutish.

Just for giggles, I have an IQ between 140-145. I'm graduating from UW with a degree in International Studies with a Business Certification and I'm planning on getting an MBA. I also go to the gym and like to skateboard.

You are constructing a false dichotomy between being intelligent and being an alpha-male. I surf. I like Daft Punk. I played high school football. I can also speak Japanese at a business level.

Regardless, your lack of spelling and/or grammar skills leads me to believe that you are either not a native English speaker or... maybe you shouldn't be speaking poorly of anyone's intelligence.

That said, everyone is free to their own opinion. I personally think Seattle is a little depressing, what with the terrible weather for nine months out of the year and general antisocial dispositions of people here. That said, some people love it here. I don't feel the need to spout insults on a forum.

You're either a troll (in which case, you got me... props) or you're just immature with no coping mechanisms. Try investing in one of those stress balls?

Michelle said...

LOVE this article. I also hate San Diego, for all the reasons you mentioned. THANK YOU!!

jomammaaintfoolin said...


jomammaaintfoolin said...

It's funny to me that this blog is so old and still keeps rolling. Never gonna give you up, indeed.

I moved to Leucadia (Encinitas) in 2010.

Everyone kept asking me if I was, "west of THE five." It took me four years to realize that this is a really snooty way of asking how close to the beach to you are.

Since I have no sense of direction, it never occurred to me to care if I was, "West of the five" and this elicited many dismayed and disbelieved looks from would be friends.

I realize my ignorance on this topic might lead you to believe that like most Californians, my brain is made of instant oatmeal, but it isn't.

I'm originally from New York- where I grew up learning and KNOWING that the smarter and wittier I was, the better off I would be in life.

Here, it would seem that kids learn that the more that they own, and the prettier they are, the better.

It's fucking disgusting.


Boob jobs for high graduation presents. Shit for brains. Welcome to the Twilight Zone.

In four years, I managed to make ZERO friends. Everyone I met was superficial, self absorbed and so out of of touch with reality that they couldn't understand how or why I struggled to make ends meet here on 40K a year. "Oh gee, no, I'm sorry, I can't do $400 bottle service at some lame club in the Gaslamp, because uh, I need to eat food for a month."

When I fell upon tough times, these people couldn't relate. And I wasn't whiney about it at all. They just live on a different planet. A planet of white Mercedes and endless bank accounts and three thousand dollar road bikes and surf surf surf.

Sadly, not one of them had an interesting thing to say. Not a one.

I went to OB a few times where I thought people were more down to earth. A new "friend" left me at a fourth of July House party knowing that I was 30 miles from my home in Encinitas. Thank you, asshole. I hope you get date raped by a Giraffe one day.

The beaches are crowded on weekends. The jackholes in campers take up all the parking along the PCH at the crack of dawn which leaves no parking for us locals. FINE. We will ride our bikes and brave being hit by an Asian woman on a cell phone driving a Lexus SUV just to get a patch of tar laden sand. Oh yes, there is oil on the sand. That's what those black marks are. Ever stepped in it? I have. It reeks and is a bitch to get off of your foot. You can try to get it off in the water, of course, but make sure there aren't any "NO SWIM" signs posted for that day. Yeah, SD beaches get a lot of sewage. MMMMMMM. Poo in my waves. Awesome.

Duck lips, boob jobs, trophy wives, more salons than you can shake a stick at, and 50 year old men who never grew out of the surfing pre-pubescent stage of life. They have nothing to say about anything but somehow make six figures. It's miraculous.

I've never met a more ignorant bunch of people who just really don't deserve all the money that they have.

(Excluding the Kardashians.)

The food in SD sucks. It does. Don't even argue. People praise the crappiest of food here. It's a strange phenomenon. Maybe sewage water beaches dulls the taste buds.

The San Diego accent is unbearable. Go watch the SNL skit, "The Californians" and tell me is isn't true.


Maybe because I'm from NY I was just bred to hate this place- but I really WAS prepared to like it- to love it- and I find few things lovable about it at all.

the sunsets are gorgeous. the weather is great but its mid October and its still 80 degrees and that's getting a little old.

i recently looked at a 400 square foot apartment overlooking a mall and a parking lot. No a/c and no washer dryer and they were asking $1405 NOT including tax and uncovered parking spot. It was in central Carlsbad.

jomammaaintfoolin said...

nless you have mega bucks and can live ON the sand, it's a crock of shit here.

You'll spend all of your life in traffic dodging bad Asian drivers in Mercedes SUV's.

The people you meet will be all surface. What you drive, where you surf, what you own- THAT will matter.

What you know? No one cares.

Crack a joke? No one has a sense of humor.

I liked my neighborhood when I first moved here and now it is being gentrified and ruined by more Mercedes driving idiots.

It's like the freaking step ford wives over here.

It's gross.

Really gross.

And NO ONE looks happy except the stoned surfer on the beach.

I'm leaving.

I'll miss the neighborhood I once loved, the beach for it's sunsets, and a few other things.

But after living in Boulder and Telluride and Prescott and Maui and Flagstaff, I have to say, San Diego is the most annoying, over rated place I have ever lived. $1400 for 400 square feet overlooking a shopping mall!!!???


*Swim at your own risk.

Chris said... glad I'm not alone. Typed "I hate San Diego" like so many others, was led here. Originally from Florida, I moved here to escape hurricanes and mosquitoes.
I can't wait to leave. Honestly, the one person defending SD illustrates why, and perfectly. Who the hell states their own IQ, with a point range no less?! What an idiot....but he's really desperate for you to know he's not one, oblivious to the very fact that intelligence isn't actually memorized information.
What the fuck is with drivers here? It really isn't that difficult. I never understood the phrase "Mexican standoff" until I arrived at a four way stop sign in San Diego. Holy shit. Or the idiots that sit at a stop sign, until another car comes along, then suddenly need to beat you through the intersection, because, you know, they are in such a hurry! In a hurry to get to the next stop sign and sit there checking Facebook for five minutes. I've had drivers tailgate me through residential neighborhoods when I was driving around randomly to familiarize myself with the area. Every random turn, wouldn't you know it, they're going that way too! Once I pulled over to let the person pass, he passed, then pulled over, got out, and put his arms up in an invitation to fight. Yup, wanted to fight me because I let him go by. Wow. But that is about the level of consideration out here. I once had a driver in front of me sit through SIX cycles of a freeway entrance ramp light. He only decided to drive (running a red no less) when I started to get out of my car and handle it Florida style. Every single day, I see someone do something that qualifies as the new stupidest thing I've ever seen.
Then there's the need to stand where someone else already is. No, not just any area will do, they NEED to be right where you are. I could be in the dogshit section of the grocery store and ten brain dead idiots will wander up with that vapid blank stare and literally nudge me out of the way, so badly needing to do nothing. It's gotten to the point I won't even go into a grocery store until after 9pm. And that brings me to another point about SD, the grocery stores are fucking useless out here. If you need five items, you'll be going to at least four stores. One store near me had almost 30 types of barbecue sauce and not one of steak sauce. And they don't even understand barbecue out here....or good food at all. I get weird looks for eating avocados by themselves instead of on top of EVERYTHING. Every restaurant has Mexican cooks, yet Mexican isn't the best food you can get here. Half the taco shops can't get beans right.
There's good beer. They sell it outside of the county, so that's kinda moot.
Every good mountain biking trail has been closed in the last year or two, they issue $475-1500 tickets for riding them. Meanwhile, there's homeless encampments in every undeveloped plot of land.
Friends are just people that want something you have to offer, if you expect any kind of reciprocity, friendship terminated.
Fuck I hate it here. My wife is from here, her family is here, she's hesitant to leave. Finally told her, I may just she's willing to maybe look elsewhere.
Can't fucking wait.

Jack Black said...
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Jack Black said...

Moved here 3 years ago from Florida. I understand everyone's complaints on here who are from Florida. I moved here and noticed real quick....
There are a shit ton of angry people here. I have smiled at someone before and they think I want to fight them, or they think you are insane/bat shit crazy simply for smiling and acknowledging them.
Pull up to a red light and look around at the people next to you. The average person looks ready to snap here.
The average person on the street here won't even make eye contact with you much less smile or say hello. It's so impersonal and fuck you here in San Diego. I don't get it. SD is advertised as this family friendly, sunny, warm place. It's cold and unfriendly as fuck. Try counting the number of times in a day someone let's the door slam in your face or is rude to you.
Here's one nobody mentioned. What's up with all the damn Asians everywhere? I'm cool with diversity. But me in the middle of a bunch of Asians, most of whom are rude inconsiderate assholes, is NOT what I call diversity. Sweet Jesus get me back to Florida. I was happy to leave Florida but I would go back in a milisecond. My wife is from Cali though so I'm stuck. I won't live my life like this here though, so I'm already plotting my escape with or without my wife unfortunately. It's not worth my sanity.

rwrice said...

I love this thread! I read through the entire thing because I needed to see for myself that, "It's not just me".

Thanks to all who posted. It's conforting to discover that I wasn't wrong. San Diego does indeed suck.

Let me share one of my experiences as proof.

I was sitting at a gas station waiting a minor eterity for my turn at the gas pump. (To those who've lived here that will come as no surprise) Suddenly, the small truck in front of me started to back up. It had a camper shell on the back of it so the rear window was blocked in such a way that the driver couldn't see behind his vehicle. I honked my horn to warn him of my presense but he continued to back up anyway until he hit my right front fender.
It was at that time I realized why he didn't hear me honking my horn to warn him. He had his radio tuned into some Mexican radio station and turned up so loud that he didn't hear it.
If you're wondering why I didn't just throw my vehicle into reverse and start backing up rapidly to avoid him it was because there was another vehicle waiting in line immediately behind me preventing me from doing this.
I got out of my vehicle and approached the driver of the small truck. I asked him to pull over into an area where there where a couple of available parking spots in the gas station parking lot so we could exchange information.
It was when we got over to the area that I discovered that the guy didn't speak English, had no form of identification at all, had no drivers liscense and no proof of insurance.
I immediately called the San Diego Police Department.
I got the usual response you would expect from the officer who answered the phone. He said, "If there were no injuries and an ambulance was not needed to just exchange information".
I asked the officer, "What if this guy doesn't speak English, has no form of identification at all, has no drivers liscense and no proof of insurance"?
Only after I told him I wanted to speak to his supervisor did he reluctantly agree to roll a police car to the location.
When the officer arrived he told the guy that he couldn't let him leave with the truck due to his having no drivers liscense or insurance.
After hearing this, the guy used the pay phone to call one of friends to come pick them up.
When I realized the officer was going to let this guy walk away from the scene, keep in mind this guy had no form of identification at all, I turned to the officer and asked, "You're just going to let this guy walk"? "He has no form of identification at all". "He could be anbody". He could be wanted for all you know".
You know what that San Diego Police Officer, sworn to protect my rights as a United States Citizen, said to me?
"So could you".

That was it for me. I gave my two week notice at work, sold my house in Rancho San Diego and moved back to Colorado.

This is a true story and can be verified by Paul Veralia, State Farm Insurance agent in LaMesa, California.

Thank you for reading this and Happy Holidays!

Trish said...

Praise the Lord, I am NOT ALONE!
Ive lived in Hawaii for 8 years and built a solid foundation there but decided to try new airs moving here. WORST THING I HAVE EVER DONE!

First, and what bothers me the most - IT IS NOT WARM AND SUMMER ALL YEAR LONG! Trust me, Ive lived in Hawaii, wheres 80F all year long. I have to wear sweatshirts and jackets, and coats, and scarves and boots and all the shit because some days, like today is freaking 45 degrees outside. Yeah, sun is shinning. Good luck with that. One year here and I hadn't been able to swim in the ocean (have to fly back to Hawaii for it) because its so cold and polluted.

Second and as many people commented here... PEOPLE. Whats wrong with people here? I am well traveled, educated and outgoing and I don't have one friend here. Its like people here belong to some sort of private club and you can only join if you meet their stupid standards. They think SO MUCH of themselves its actually disgusting. Even my boyfriend of seven months, bless his soul, sometimes has to be told to get over himself because he, and everyone around here, tend to think people owe them something. WTF?

People can be friendly, but they won't let you in. Theres no sense of community here, its the weirdest thing. Almost herd to explain in words. I never thought that, at the age of 31, I would be struggling to make friends and feel accepted in life. This place is cold, and its got cold people.

I regret my decision of moving here every day.

T.H.E. Truth said...
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T.H.E. Truth said...

Wow... This is pretty surreal. I lived here for 3 years while I went to college at UCSD, and I always thought I was the only person who felt this way. The weirdest thing about this thread, is that everyone has the EXACT same reasons for hating it. There doesn't seem to be too much variability.

I recently went back for New Years in the hopes that maybe I was too young back in the day, and that now I would like the city. Within hours I quickly remembered why the place absolutely stinks.

I could nit-pick about all kinds of things, but the solitary, primary reason why this place has some serious issues is : THE PEOPLE.

The culture here really does need to be studied; it's kind of baffling. I live only ~200 miles north in Los Angeles, and the difference between people in LA and SD is staggering.

I could focus on many facets about why these people are just backwards, but being a guy, having lived here during college and returned multiple times for the nightlife; I'm going to deep-dive about one of the saddest things in San Diego : its MALE CULTURE.

When I moved there, I started noticing something was up when every guy I'd run into asked if I caught "the fight" last night. Pretty soon I figured out what they meant was the UFC fight on TV. This immediately got me fascinated with this town because I really cant imagine a more brainless activity, much less talking about UFC like its some big-time event. As weird as UFC is, it's really a direct line into understanding SD male bravado.

I get it... animalism, aggression, domination, pure combat. Arrrgghh... it's good fun. And sure, learning about different fighting styles and techniques is actually pretty interesting. It makes sense; but when every guy is going to the bar to catch the fight; it plays into this attitude that everyone is some warrior whose preparing for battle.

This also plays into the fact that Camp Pendleton is right up the road and is the largest Marine base in the US. (Advice - Don't call it the 'Army' its the Marines, people will lose their shit). There's a very large military presence here, and it seeps into everything. Say what you will about military and its politics, I respect the hell out of anyone who is going to risk their life in the defense of our country. But boy, these guys aren't the sharpest on the block. And to make matters worse, they are essentially brainwashed daily into becoming killing machines. Then they hit up SD for a night on the town. They're either having a great night or ruining yours...

Being a single guy, you basically learn you have to act like a meat-head, super-aggressive asshole, whose ready for a fight at any minute. I can't tell you how many times a casual joke, off-handed comment, or even just standing in a corner somewhere will cause a misunderstanding where people freak the fuck out and start picking a fight with you. It's pretty clear that all the guys are on the same page about this; you need to be ready to prove dominance at every turn, and if anyone shows any kind of vulnerability, they're done.

The primary lesson I learned was this: San Diegan's don't respond with curiosity or compromise, they respond with aggression. This is a culture of fight first, talking later.

A fun way of handling these interactions is to just stand there calmly and try and slowly talk sense to them, and watch as they quickly lose their minds. They typically won't actually hit you, they just put on a really big show of aggression and expect you to return in kind. When you don't, they literally have no idea what to do, get confused and walk away creeped out.

If you want to experience this yourself, all you need to do is wait till 8pm and head to Pacific Beach. Start walking down Garnet and hit up any of bars there. Try starting casual conversation with literally anyone and I guarantee you wont make it to the end of Garnet without getting in some form of argument.

T.H.E. Truth said...


That's kind of the game in SD, very tribal mentality. Everyone is in a pack, different packs rub shoulders, but there's very little room for individual identity.

There's a palpable disrespect for intellectualism here. Or rather, a strong lack of understanding. If you are someone who likes talking about art, film, music, literature, religion, philosophy, politics, hell anything you read about in the New Yorker; you're gonna have a bad time. SD people seem pretty stuck in there ways and really just don't give a shit about anything that might individually unique to somebody. Sure there are always exceptions, but when you encounter those people, you get the feeling they don't have too many friends.

Having said all that, not everything is bad. SOME OF THE GOOD :

- Awesome CRAFT BEERS : this cant be understated. If you like IPA's, this place is heaven.
- The BEACHES rock. I'm sorry, I know a lot of you on here have said the beaches are cold, cloudy, or polluted. That's straight crazy, SD is rightfully known for some of the best beaches in the land. I'm a big surfer and this place is the end all be all of Cali surfing. Sure you may need a wetsuit but just head to Black's on even an off day and you'll have an amazing time.
- LA JOLLA COVE - I know some people don't like this area for various reasons (parking, snootyness) but try taking some kayaks out and visit the seals by the cove. It's pretty amazing.

The best part is when I bring up the fact I'm from Los Angeles, all the San Diegan's go "Gross, it's so superficial up there!!" and I have to literally stop and stare at them in awe. I'm born and was raised all over LA, I know superficiality VERY well... The difference is, people in LA kind of know that the culture is superficial, it's sort of a big joke that everyone is in on. And most Angelinos are very aware and respectful of those who've chosen to follow 'fake' culture and who haven't. But San Diego... I don't know what it is but everyone seems incapable of looking in the mirror. They are just dead set on being one mono-culture of the worst parts of superficiality; and to top it off, they are just too proud to notice it.

A lot of this can be seen as a liberal vs. conservative debate, and I'm sure that has something to do with it. But man, there's something in the air down there; people are just too eager to act like a-holes.

I'd love to hear others thoughts, this has been something that's fascinated me for a long time now.

24EverThine said...

What about starting a group on to bring together everyone who hates SD with a passion? Here's what I have written so far as the intro. I'm wary of putting it on Meetup just yet because I don't want others (i.e., native San Diegans, San Diego Lovers) to bash it and force its shut down.

Based on the blog post "10 reasons i hate san diego" (, this group is for those of you that hate San Diego so much that we stay at home to avoid that which we hate, and escape to our so called life at home. You’re saving every dime to go back to your last city, which is now ‘the s**t’ if it wasn’t before compared to this hellhole you have found yourself in. Need a place to call home and be surrounded by those who echo your sentiment and share your loathing, or just to vent about what you can’t stand about this ‘beautiful’ city? Then this group is for you. You might meet someone here that will make you want to stay, or at least cope ;) .

If you could comment to let me know your interest, I will create the group on, and we can have our first vent session over coffee or drinks :).

If you have other ideas, leave them in this blog comment thread.

Happy SD Survival Everyone!

pspees said...

Wow! This is better than I could have ever imagined. I always find myself coming back here for some warmth. For the one who wrote about staying home so as to avoid the mess out there, cheers friend. I FULLY understand your plight. I don't really enjoy anything here anymore; gaslamp, beach, North Park, it's all become shit for anyone with a soul. More to come my friends...

arocbuild said...

Hated it. Too spread out, too fast paced, too much conservative military coastal elitism. San Diegans not the most friendly. High rent rates near the coast (the whole purpose of living in a beach town). Beach dominated by surfers (I love the beach but don't surf). Food nothing to write home about. Too much big retail, not enough progressive urban anything. I came back to NY metro which I don't love either but it beats San Diego.

Soul of a Monster said...

Came here because I actually, unfortunately, considered moving here at one point in time, to get out of this hellhole called Maryland. Sadly, this sounds like a west coast version of new jersey , Maryland , d.c. this might be what America is turning into en mass

So Long San Diego! said...

This is seriously the most vindicating post I have found on this subject. Thanks to the original poster and all subsequent comments. It is sad to me that San Diego has not improved at all in the 8 years since the original post was written. Great progress San Diego!

You all make me feel less alone in my hatred toward this unenlightened, boring, ignorant, segregated, "city." What's the point of having 1.5 million people when they're all lazy, or property managers (one in the same to me at this point).

I've never seen a collective group of d-bags in my life. And I'm a native New Yorker. You'd think there would be more of a chance for rampant douchebaggery in a city of 8 million. But, alas, San Diego you have won that title with only 1.5 million! Congrats! Instead of America's Finest City, its nickname should be changed to "California's Wasteland."

I'm moving back to Santa Barbara in a few weeks (lived there back in 2005 til late 2009) and I cannot wait. Santa Barbara is a fraction of the size of San Diego (thank goodness) and has so many more educated, well-traveled, interesting people. It has its flaws, but I'll take them any day over rudeness, disregard for the environment despite major environmental threats like the drought no one seems to care about, zero culture or art, ugly and rundown infrastructure, and endless freeway noise. While I'm happy I got back to California and am thankful to San Diego for being that stepping stone, I am so ready to leave this place. And I've only been here since December, 2013, not even two years!

Goodbye San Diego! And good riddance!

Amity said...

I grew up here and hated it, but then I moved away to a happier place. Now I'm back visiting my family now and seriously every single person I've talked to here has been so rude and condescending and judgemental, I feel like I'm hated on sight. Its all passive aggressive, everyone has just a little bit of a judgemental look, a little pity in their voice, and then just plain disgust or confusion (why??), and those little bits of rudeness add up really quick. I cried yesterday thinking there must be something wrong with me that everyone else can see, that I'm oblivious of. And even if there's not, I feel like I cant be myself here. The negative attention is not worth the freedom of being oneself in the open, which is so so terrible. I came into town happy to see my family and in a great frame of mind with a super posi attitude and now I would rather stay inside than risk catch someone else openly making a face at me. I dont understand what they could be staring at, it hurts my feelings so much and makes me want to hide. I'm a tall girl with nose piercings and short hair but thats not crazy? I dont look like a criminal or a freak and I'm not looking to get a reaction out of people. I dont know what I'm supposed to do.

thanks for posting this, and thanks to everyone commenting over the years. I feel validated that there are so many others that get the same treatment. Since I moved Ive been pretty vocal about how miserable I was in southern CA. I hope some of you have taken flight to better and nicer places since this was originally posted! You are not alone

arocbuild said...

Where's your new happy place? Please share.

rather die than live in SD for REAL! said...

The cove in LA Jolla is filled with dead and starving sea lion pups and tons of reeking shit from birds, beach is filled with dog shit...oh the pier ? Filled with tons of dead lobster and crustaceans as far as the eye can see... IB?, TJ shit and dead birds, PB tourist bullshit and no surf..Wind n Sea ? Nazi surf rats and crusty OGs, old man'sTourmaline? Rolling rocks that will break your ankle until you can get out surf deep... garbage beach more locals and surf that's hardly accessible low tide at smelling up the whole beach that's covered with the letter it is called garbage beach for a reason you can literally see the garbage protruding out of the sediment layers alongside the cliff or extremely high tides but are almost impossible to jump into and paddle out... you can't possibly be serious about saying its the best surf I had a way better time driving up to Malibu for the day and Santa Cruz any day of the week I don't care if the water is cold and cloudy... of course I lived in for both Santa Cruz and Hawaii for over 10 years each and I would rather go surfing in either of those places and he didn't ever paddle out in San Diego again! I'm living in Snow and don't even miss surfing at all....I just visit Hawaii when I get the itch... really says something that I deal with TSA and fly on a plane for over 5 hours...hours than to EVER surf in shit hole SD again!s

LalaBV1 said...

I have moved here in SD 4 years ago from Ventura county. My old town is small but I have waaaayyyy supportive friends. I moved here for work and continuing school. When I first came here in SD, I noticed that people stare with their negative, piercing eyes. I am FIlipino and my own people treat their own the worst. What I really hate about people's attitude here is how two faced and super unreliable they are. I make my way to meet and make time for people. Yet they are disrespectful of my time plus effort I make. They ignore friendly gesture of hello. I even make plans of get together for they say "yes" only to be abandoned on the time I am supposed to be meeting with them by ignoring calls and text. Can't they simple message, "Hey, Im busy..sorry I can't make it."

I have lost my positive, friendly attitude around here. I cried and I cried and even asked myself what is wrong with me?????

pspees said...

It's a military city. Hence why status and rank are #1 with people here, and why there's weak awareness about things like art, culture, the environment etc. It was once a better place but most of what I loved about growing up here burned in the 2003 fires and the city has since become invaded by legions of transplants who call it their own. So many to the point of it being "their" town of pricy beer hipster shit.

desi said...

WOW!!! Thank you!!! I have had a 2nd home here for 10 years (yeah I know 1st world problems) I have NEVER seen the neighbors south of me, and we live 8 feet apart!! I know what they fight about as I can hear them but have never seen them In the 30 years I've been "summering" here I have never made ONE, not ONE friend. Not ONE neighbor ever came over to say "hi" to us or introduced themselves. I went and introduced myself to all my neighbors, nothing return. One neighbor was even rude enough to say "oh this (house) is only good enough for your 2nd home?" How rude is that???? Rudest people I've EVER met Yes I am getting out; gonna get a place in LA where people are actually polite to me. I HATE the whole San Diego County Even my kids notices how rude people are here. Thank you for posting, I'm glad it's not just me

Spoiled to the max..... said...

Lots of spoiled people here for sure. Chill and make the best of where you live. People would die to come to America and of course San Diego too. Be grateful with what you have. It is far more than most have in their lives. Be grateful !

Greg Roman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

Still all these years later and people are still commenting. I moved here in 2010 and also have not made any friends here. Any potential friends I could have had were flakey and fake. I was born and raised in Alaska, got my degree at UW in Seattle and my Masters at USC. I met my husband at USC who is originally from Texas. We moved to San Diego because of work (we are specialized) and because he has some relatives here. Five years later and I still cannot feel comfortable here. I would take Alaskas winters any day over San Deigo's bland, sunny weather any day. I also agree with other commenters that there is no sense of community here; people seem to be more interested with what you have than who you are. I've never met so many girls until I came here who have had breast augmentation like people get their hair dyed. I'm appalled at how people have a lack of priority. People are willing to go into debt just to look like they have money.

I also cannot understand people's inability to handle truths here. I had to learn fast how to sugarcoat things here for people. We Alaskans just say it how it is because it may mean your survival.

When people ask me how I can't love San Diego, I tell them easily. No one here knows how to hold an intelligent conversation. The weather is boring and same everyday of the year (except when it just gets hot). I miss my clean Alaskan air and the fact I get to have four seasons. There is a plethora of neurotic, narcissistic people who cannot seem to mature beyond 18 with mannerisms of a selfish brat. Have you ever seen a middle-aged man have a temper tantrum? I didn't think people like that existed until I came here.

Also, the traffic is starting to get as bad as LA, but the drivers are more ignorant of thei surroundings. I once almost got ran over THREE times walking through a hospital parking lot because people ran stop signs or "didn't see me". There is a dangerously large amount of demented (medically speaking) elderly people in San Diego who are still driving. So try to keep clear of that old person that seems to be driving funny on the freeway as chances are he/she had dementia, macular degeneration or cataracts.

I also agree with prior comments of rudeness. San Diegans think they are so nice, but they don't know what real niceness is. How about not standing-up lunch with someone or how about not ignoring the old person needing some help after they have fallen? People here don't say please or thank you or hold doors open for each other. If you do encounter this, it is usually a transplant. The majority of SD natives here are self-entitled and think they should be patted on the back for every mediocre accomplishment that the rest of the world considers just normal activity.

I cannot wait to move out. Once my husband's boss retires in the next few years we will be out of here faster than you can blink.

Greg Roman said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Unknown said...

I lived in San Diego for four years. I thought that I would have enjoyed it, but it ended up being a miserable experience because of the people. Good grief, they stare at you all of the damn time and if you even glance even the slightest, they want to fight on the spot. Even the Starbucks' are crappy places to go; as I once had a stupid manager ask me to give up my seat because a guy wanted to sit there. He said that he needed the seat for his laptop. Never mind that I was there for thirty minutes before his arrival. When I refused to give up my seat, the manager called security who then called the police. Luckily, the police officer was annoyed with the manager and left. If you do have a conversation with a San Diegan, do not be surprised if they act like they are too good to talk to you the next time around. Sucks! Never enough parking anywhere and roads have a ton of potholes! The city government is a total joke. Forget having an opinion or an idea that is different from anyone else. Apartments are way overpriced and most of the sports teams have losing records most of the time. Team owners are cheap as hell! Glad to have left San Diego!!

izi said...

I agree with you i though everywhere
in u.s. it's like that but now I see everybody post I changed my mind I believe people here are very materialist all they care about themselves also very fake I was born in Romania I came here 6 years ago but I hate it here I miss the seasons here is just one weather and crappy people they act like a robots I'll move to new York

LalaBV1 said...

We all share the same experience here--It's very hard to make friends. I don't know what it is in here in SD. It seems to be nice place. If you are a transplant and don't have a humongous family member here, good luck on trying to stablish close people here. I am planning to get out of SD and move back up north Cali, close to Santa Barbara. I have so many friends there and I love how my people up north are humble and honest. In contrast to SD people, majority of people here are super egocentric, materialistic even if they are poor themselves, judgmental, rude, immature, users, drama kings and queens...what else. I have too much experience of a headache trying to make it work to make friends here. What I do now if accept what it is. It's a different culture here and I don't fit even after 6 years. I hope SD's culture here will change. I'm just sharing my experience and I have something to compare. I look forward to get out here though.

Sealpointlvr said...

I'm from Ireland.. The number of friends I would have in 1 year there would be 30 times more than the ones ive made here in 16 years.

Ive a small kid now and even tho I have a good career, i feel trapped by this place. Its just too spread out.

One thing that got me by over the years was volunteering, with animal rescues. So if anyone has an interest in this.. Give me a hollar..I or the other rescue people come in all shapes n sizes, ages, genders etc.. But itsgood to have a true support sytem when you start from scratch

Unknown said...

My lady and I moved to San Diego from Pittsburgh (at considerable risk and expense) a year and a half ago. Having visited San Diego previously, we were so impressed with the weather, the beaches, and Balboa Park that we decided to load up our cars and move across the country.

About six months ago – a year in – we finally gave up rationalizing. We are moving back to the northeast imminently, probably to Philadelphia.

Let me count the reasons why we hate living in San Diego:

1. Driving: You must drive 45 minutes just to find a place to take a walk. Those 45 minutes will be a white-knuckling, near-death experience in which you will lose what little remains of your faith in humanity.

2. Parking: By the time you find parking at your destination, you won't even want to be there anymore.

3. Vastness: If you should choose to walk anywhere, you will not arrive anywhere worth walking to. Driving will not improve matters much, unless you are happy to drive for at least 30 minutes. San Diego is essentially a sparse network of shopping malls and theme parks tenuously connected by pavement.

4. Vapidness: The overwhelming majority of San Diegans are not prone to philosophical reflection -- nor are they prone to sincerity or elementary civility.

5. Insularity: Wake up alone, drive alone, sit in a cubicle alone. Reverse and repeat. There are almost no serendipitous opportunities to make new friends, such as one might find in a walkable or transit-friendly (or just plain friendly) city. Even if an opportunity for conversation arises, item #4 will surely thwart it.

6. Financial Poverty: The cost of living is only rivaled by the likes of San Francisco and New York, and the wages do not even begin to keep up. We live in a kitchen-less studio apartment well south of the city and pay what a mortgage would cost in a sane place.

7. Time Poverty: Items 1 through 3 mean we have very little time to enjoy the beaches we came here for. Sitting in a car is like hitting the pause button on living. Commute times via public transit may be longer (technically), but they present opportunities to read, study, think, and socialize – so your time isn't lost. The primary opportunity inherent to freeway driving is the opportunity to die.

8. Homelessness: The only affordable place to live in downtown San Diego is the vast network of tent neighborhoods inhabited by the foulest homeless people I have ever encountered. The scale of the problem is so out of hand, and the city's management of the problem so inept, that it stretches the limits of credulity.

9. Tijuana: As far as I can tell, nothing good comes from that city, and nothing good goes into it. My lady is from Nairobi, and I lived in Ghana for two years, so it really means something that neither of us have ever seen a place filthier than Tijuana. Just over the border, it is much too close for comfort.

10. Douchebaggery: Waxy moustaches, silly hats, skin-tight leggings on men, tribal tattoos, backward baseball caps, Hummer limousines, spray tans, boob jobs… you name it. If it's douchebaggery you want, then San Diego has more than you can handle.

So yes, Philadelphia. It's cold and it's high-crime, but aside from that I can't think of any reason why we wouldn't choose it over San Diego. Off we go, while we are still young enough to readjust!

NedFranLosTuck said...

What I liked about living in Greater San Diego:
1. Walking along the coast near sunset. The most beautiful sunset I've ever seen was in downtown Encinitas (second place was out in Anza-Borrego).
2. Petco Park is one of America's best (relatively) new ballparks.
3. Taking a drive out the 8 or the 78 to the desert areas.
4. Proximity to Mexico. I made it to TJ, and would like to come back down and go to Tecate at some point.
5. Imperial Beach is a hidden gem, and probably the last great "blue-collar" beach town in S.D. County.
6. The area's geared toward our men and women in uniform!

However, none of these likes were incentive enough for me to stay living in North County San Diego.

What I quite disliked, even hated, about Greater San Diego:
1. Rude drivers...waaaaaaay ruder than L.A. or Bay Area drivers, but maybe not as rude as NYC or Boston drivers.
2. Surly customer service. I expect it in L.A. or San Francisco, or especially Chicago or the urban Northeast. But, San Diego?!
3. Unimpressive food scene for a city of its size, stature and wealth. Even L.A. and the Bay have better Mexican food!
4. The general "vibe" of the San Diego region--cliquish and defensive for being such a transplant city, and very superficial and shallow for being so "down to Earth" and "anti-L.A." Very unfriendly.
5. It felt strangely "un-Californian" to me--not like L.A., O.C., Santa Barbara, S.F., Oakland, Sacramento, Fresno, Palm Springs, etc. This sensation is the most difficult for me to articulate, except to say that S.D. feels sort of like a Milwaukee on the Pacific.
6. My landlord was the worst I've ever had. This, after the process of securing housing in S.D. was the worst of any place I've lived in the world.
7. Depressed wages in the job market, especially compared to nearby O.C. and L.A. which also have a comparable cost of living
8. Job interviewers seemingly made it a point to be rude, condescending, abrupt, and unprofessional. Experienced this much less often in L.A. and the Bay.
9. Coronado is waaaaaay overrated.
10. As a single guy, the women were quite beautiful, but as bland and pretentious on the inside as they were pretty on the outside. (They're still better than the "49er 'strong, independent'" super leftist women of the Bay Area, I'll grant that much. BTW, a "49er" is a woman who is a 4 but thinks she is a 9.)

Five months living there was enough for me. I made a couple of okay/good-ish friends, enjoyed trips out to Anza-Borrego, and was glad to have a passport so I could visit Tijuana (which is completely filthy, by the way). I get why S.D. appeals to soooooo many, but it wasn't for me. I've lived in the Upper South, Lower Midwest, Southern California (LA, OC, SD), and Northern California in the United States, and even for a brief stint in Western Europe, so it's not like I just moved crosstown.

People who don't live in SD are bewildered when I tell them I don't like SD. I couldn't understand why anyone wouldn't like it, either...until I experienced it on a daily basis.

NedFranLosTuck said...
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NedFranLosTuck said...

My advice for those interested in relocation to Southern California:

- The best urban experience in Southern California is, without question, Los Angeles. Same cost of living as San Diego, but all the amenities of the alpha world city that it is. People are even a little nicer up there, too. Some 170 languages (maybe even more) are spoken daily in L.A. County. Every type of cuisine imaginable can be found there (the only place that offers more culinarily in the U.S. is NYC). Sure, traffic sucks, but try to live close to where you work--and, Metro is improving its countywide rail coverage as we speak. The resurging Downtown, the Westside, numerous valleys (San Fernando, San Gabriel, Santa Clarita), countless nature preserves, I could go on and on.
- If L.A. isn't your speed, North Orange County has its multiculturalism (tons of Vietnamese food) and proximity to L.A. while still being very clean and low crime.
- Long Beach (still in L.A. County) has Belmont Shore, great downtown, and improving bicycle-friendliness. It's basically San Diego, but a little friendlier and a little more literate. You can even take the Blue Line straight to downtown L.A. (might not be advisable after dark, however, to be honest).
- Ventura/Oxnard and Santa Barbara are, although different, quintessential and compact Southern California small beach cities.

South Orange County is generally the same snob-fest that San Diego County is, though you can pay it a visit for yourself and make up your own mind. The Inland Empire has some scattered areas of "awesomeness" like Temecula and Riverside, but it otherwise mostly serves as a giant commuter suburb to L.A., O.C., and S.D.--not that there's anything wrong with that, but it's just good to understand that.

Greg Roman said...
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pine unleaded said...

Here's a 30 yr old locals perspective born raised and still here;

I grew up a mile or so from the beach and was born in 1985, that year the population of the entire county was 2.126 million and last year it was 3.3; those numbers don't seem Like a huge difference but damn have I noticed. People here are mostly white(even if they aren't ) mildly conservative and ignorant usually even if properly educated and they like it that way; the want or desire to step outside of comfort ,normal (whatever that is ) popular or fed to you by a spoon made of logos is more of a lack there of.
It is without doubt the south of California something like a southern Midwest state stripping at cheetahs who gives you mean looks every time you give it a 20 and it only accepts 20s.
When I looked east from my parents house in del mar heights in the eighties the 56 did not exist and niether did nearly half the county. It was all nature beautiful gorgeous almost untouched nature. That is all but gone. For a county that prides its entire image on natural wonder and beauty to the rest of the world; people here don't give a fuck. Even the local surfer grom kids here leave their trash from 711 on in and around every park in the county, it's pathetic. If and when you do make a break for a hike or swim be prepared to hear shit talked about you around you loudly seemingly at you but don't you dare look that way by some spandex wearing asshole taking themselves and their exercise and their exercise look very seriously. The infrastructure here is crap mostly outdated and when redone is gody and in the wrong direction key point being the freeways. Very quickly becoming the LA traffic helhole it was paid off to be and wouldn't you know it the same people who are responsible for Orange County are responsible for all the development I mentioned earlier except this time there's a lot more racism which is also lame considering only 40 % white is a lot of color in a pie.
It's almost like the city just wants to eat itself just without knowing it and the people want to imitate the tourists, but then decide they like themselves too much.

Greg Roman said...

Every time I read articles or blogs like this, I get the impression that the author is either holding out on telling the truth for fear of reprisal or the author himself/herself is a bratty San Diegan who can only complain about minor things since he/she likely knows nothing about the outside world, in which case he/she should keep his/her mouth shut, thus reserving the floor for real opinions.

Gay Lord said...

All of you had one incredibly subjective experience where one day you walked outside, encountered a rude person and assumed the entire city was full of rude people. Get real. I see negatives posted like "too many surfers at the beach" or "no place to get a decent coffee" or "night life boring, I cant make any friends" Just take a step back and realize how ridiculous you sound. This city is gorgeous and if you can't make it here, good luck to you.

Greg Roman said...

@Gay Lord You know not what you are saying. None of us have had only one experience, but many that were accumulated over a span of years. People do not just randomly wake up one morning and spew a bunch of negatives. This is not the kind of thing that people fabricate. Sure, there are some petty concerns such as those that were mentioned in the article link in my previous response. However, much of what people have expressed here is very valid. And it is not only San Diego City, but much of San Diego County. It may be beautiful looking, but looks are not always what they seem to be. You are the one who is not being real.

If it were as easy as being able to board a plane or a coach bus, then I am sure that many of us would have done so long ago. However, each of us have our own kinks to work out. If you like it here, then fine. But do not expect the rest of us to like it, too.

Mariest said...

Couldn't of said it better myself! Gay Lord, a typical person from Sandy Eggo, read a few sentences from the posts and had it all figured out.

LalaBV1 said...

I hope you guys are out of SD now! I lived here in 2011. My first experience was hate from people here. At first, I thought it will get better. But 5.5 years and still the same. I guess I'm not one of those who likes to brag about their "big house, expensive cars, 3-5 K handbag, expensive clothes, and big ego status". Who cares about superficiality and competition of who's the best? Them who cannot go beyond the depth of their skin and seeks approval from other all the time.
I am not surprised that your wife's experience here. People here are so self centered. I have screened for help one time for a disabled woman who was about to fall of her wheelchair. No one paid attention to her before except when I passed by. There was only one person that help the other lady--it was an old man. He only helped because he wants to hit on me. A lot of >50 guys here are crazy over Asians. I'm not a hooker or needing sugar daddy. Pleeeeease, noooo!!!!
Friends and having good support system is what I miss in my old town up north. Can't find that kind of closeness here in SD. One more year to finish school and I'm outta here!!!!!

aperxmim said...

San Diego, has not that many attractions, other than Sea World, Legoland and Comic Con. Yo have to be a die hard for the water, which I am not, rains here in the Fall more than Northern California. No wonder why so many are leaving this area. San Diego is dead, some companies are having difficulty find employees for tech positions. The people are really rude and there is no collaboration with the stores. Too many Jack In the Boxes, my goodness. I was tired of San Diego after 3 days, small city with absolutely nothing but Palm trees in hills, it is like you are in the same spot everywhere you go. I would move to Los Angeles or San Francisco are where this always some excitement. I talk to a store owner at the Westfield Mall and she says she wants to pack up and move her business to San Francisco or Los Angeles, but the leasing is more expensive in both cities compared to San Diego, that is why she has to stay in San Diego or try another location.

Greg Roman said...
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Greg Roman said...
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Greg Roman said...
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aperxmim said...

I went to La Jolla, California and the people are always unhappy, it is like a meteor hit the town or something, nice weather, but unhappy people, it is like a bunch of zombies.

Cherbear said...

I have lived in San Diego for 8 years now. I moved here from the UK. I am hoping to move in the next couple of months!!! I had to distance myself from the group of women I met when I first moved here because, although we are our 30s it was like being in high school again. Talking behind each others back, bullying those that didn't fit in with the group, etc.
I was told by the school how polite my daughters were. Why? Because they say please and thank you!!!! Obviously basic manners are not the norm here.
It never rains here. I have to put the sound of rain on youtube sometimes because I miss it (although I shouldn't really complain about the weather!). Despite the fact that San Diego is in a severe drought (on average the rainfall is 10-12" per year) they irrigate the sidewalks. It is getting busier and the prices of houses/apartments are increasing. I made it work (being a single working mom) but its more like surviving month to month!
I went on a hike this past weekend and came back with a backpack full of empty plastic bottles and other trash.
Don't get me started on the guys here! No respect for women. One guy thought it was ok to throw trash out of his truck window. Another guy told me I shouldn't be dating until my kids were 18! Very misogynistic. I met a nice guy from Texas and that's where we are headed......wish me luck!!!!!

sarah lee said...
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Unknown said...

All the comments are really accurate and true. I currently live in San Diego and have plans on moving out of this city. It's a terrible place to live and i would never move back here again once i leave.

Auxi Wolfy said...

All the comments are really accurate and true. I currently live in San Diego and have plans on moving out of this city. It's a terrible place to live and i would never move back here again once i leave.

Shawn Michel de Montaigne said...

I lived in San Diego from 2002 to 2012. It was a virtual prison for me. Hateful. Vapid. Lonesome. Dirty.

I tried starting a tutoring business there. Man, was that a bad idea. For those of you not involved in education, you might not believe this, but in 2004 the drop-out rate in San Diego metro schools was 75%. That isn't a typo. For some reason I thought I could help bring that down, that there was opportunity to be found in that dire number. Silly, silly me.

The Great Recession, thankfully, put a bullet into the back of the head of my little venture. And the front. And the body.

I tried really hard but made no friends there. A lot of people pretended for various amounts of time to be my friend; but every one of them turned out to be total jerks. Several tried ripping me off. Several tried to get me involved in various religious cults--of which San Diego is a breeding ground.

The alpha-male attitude there is overwhelming and sickening. It's so over-the-top as to be absurd. I laughed half the time at what I saw--I couldn't help it.

People in San Diego are about the shallowest I've ever encountered. They care about nothing but their material possessions. It's a way of life there, ingrained in everything. There's a soul-sucking emptiness about the place. No one cares. No one ever is going to care. And what's worst is they are proud of that. They think it makes them hip.

I thought for a long, long time that there was something wrong with me. There wasn't. Sometimes it really is the place you've immersed yourself into. Cultures form and take over everything and attract those who will continue them, good or bad.

Well, San Diego's culture is degenerate in about every metric you can name. My girlfriend and I finally escaped in 2012. We both cried when we passed the city limits. We're in Oregon now and much, much happier.

Jay Geylor said...

This blog is awesome - I am amazed but not really how long this blog has been going on. I am currently serving a 16 year sentence here, "yes" I am being obnoxious. I moved from NY to SD thinking I would find myself and boy I sure did. I found out I dislike, people that never make eye contact even in your office elevator when you are packed in nose to nose. Tattoos - head to toe, ball caps backward, confused look (maybe pills or meth), no motivation, "Bra", let’s go drinking on Tuesday morning, I beat my girl but for money I sleep with men, "yo dudes". No one helps anyone here, not to move, not if they collapse in the street, nothing. I have never met anyone randomly just shopping, walking in the park, bars, nothing! I am not sure if there is a silent language out here or a buzzing noise people are making to communicate, I haven't figured that out. Everyone is trying to be like everyone else, useless! Why is the gym packed during the day with healthy young men, why aren't they working???? Who is supporting them??? How do they pay for the roids/gym membership??? Hmmmm, Craigslist M4M, girls check it out, there is a good chance your man is escorting and giving some service at the local gloryhole for that cash in his pocket. Or selling drugs! Girls doing the zombie walk down the street on their phones posting pics of their boobs, not aware of their beautiful surroundings, sex is like blinking out here, no emotion, no intimacy, nothing. Keep it shallow and you will be fine. The driving is ridiculous in SD; people leave the scene of accidents even when they have someone attached to the vehicle. The cops do not show up to accidents so you can count on insurance going up. Everyone gets a license they hand them out like jelly beans. Every single weekend is some kind of walk a thon or run, making it impossible to get around the City. How about starting a run to shut this city down and let it float into the Pacific? Everyone is about healthy living until happy hour comes, then it is drink until you drop. I am so happy I was raised with a work ethic; I make a great living out here in wonderland. My counter parts do not understand that showing up every day an hour late to work in flip flops doesn’t cut it at a law firm. They wonder why I succeed, let me tell you the secret, because “I try”. Many will say I should leave, “yes” I will but not until I milk every cent out of this shallow wasteland. In conclusion if you are sincere, whitty, caring and smart you will despise it here. Yes, even with the perfect weather, the people will make you question your very existence. Remember it is not you!

Stacy T. Gilley said...
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joey Galileo Hotto said...

I definitely agree with most of your points. I'm a San Diego native, and have lived here in North County my entire life in La Jolla and Carlsbad. I'm amazed whenever I travel to other large cities how much more vibrant they are, especially San Francisco and Boston. I think San Diego is a great city if you're already wealthy and are a retiring baby boomer, but it's only okay if you are a college student. People here are incredibly stuck up and superficial, and will go on an on about how San Diego is the best city in the world while everywhere else sucks. My father is from NYC, and he does this with his family in the East Coast as well. Also, people here are incredibly rude as well: they will be nice to you, but mostly if it benefits them, and most will honk at you for waiting 0.5 seconds at a green light after it turns red. Although I love the moderate climate and delicious Mexican food here, I think it's time I venture to another city outside SD County.

Greg Roman said...
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Creepy P said...

Haters and users other human beings exist to see what you can get out of them in the southern Californian attitude. Not to mention radically undeveloped in intelligence character integrity and any kind of maturity that I saw. I'll stay in the Midwest .....four years and college there seem like two decades

Creepy P said...

Most of those Surfers are turds! It's not like the sixties where people loved nature and the surf now they're out there having fist fights over a wave ....these people are garbage in every way that I can think ofπŸ˜”

Creepy P said...

One giant experiment in mediocrity hahaha very very true including the college's there

Creepy P said...

Hence, the bumper sticker"there is no life east of I-5"

Creepy P said...

I'm from Chicago originally and in Chicago now and intelligent conversations are few and far between in this place as well but you can find one ......good luck in Southern California finding a conversation that even makes sense

Creepy P said...

Orlando Florida haha I only lasted 10 months in that pit.! The people seem like they were literally mentally impaired and everybody was a sex pervert that I ran into the first week I was there

Creepy P said...

A friend and his wife and his kids were Visiting San Diego on vacation. He held the door open for a little old lady and everybody was looking at him gasping and saying wow what a pervert. Unbelievable you won't hear a please .thank you, excuse me( what do you fart ??then stupid laugh from a middle-aged man) I promise you you will never hear" I 'm sorry "
what person grows to adult age with no manners___ it boggles the mind

Creepy P said...

The grass is greener! It has chemicals on itπŸ˜πŸ˜ƒπŸ˜„

Creepy P said...

You are the first one to mention immaturity and I'm very surprised! That is mainly what I remember about living in San Diego. I think the immaturity is the cause of the stupidity the superficiality the lack of personal Integrity among other character flaws .it's all rooted in the immaturity and why they don't mature normally, I don't know.... I've given it more thought than I should have in the past

joey Galileo Hotto said...

@Greg Roman

People in San Diego would spend hours and hours talking about how they are fortunate for living in the "best city in the world". The reality is that San Diego is very stressful and is becoming more and more like LA: Parking near the beach on a nice day is impossible and developers are demolishing open land for a very expensive hotel for rich tourists. Also, I went to a prestigious High School in Carmel Valley (Del Mar), and many of the top students are elitist and refuse to associate with anyone that isn't like them.

Also, are people really any friendlier in LA than San Diego? I'd think it's very pretentious since people are following Hollywood trends. I have been thinking about moving to Los Angeles for a while, I always get happy when I visit there, because it has the city vibe that SD lacks.

Greg Roman said...
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Maeve Alleine said...
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Maeve Alleine said...

[repost as i forgot to check for typos!]

Hey Guys,

I posted here back in 2013 - four years ago! It's great to see this blog and comments are still active so that others who are unhappy have a place to come and know they're definitely not alone.

I finally made it out of San Diego to Seattle and it's the best decision I ever made. It's like a mini of my hometown of NYC only surrounded by forest and fjords. Everything is green. Water is abundant as it rains 8 months a year. The city is beautiful and the vibe is real and progressive.

Housing prices are sky high, however, so that sucks.

On the flip side of the cost of living however, is our minimum wage of $15 and hour and we have more jobs than people to fill them. I actually scored a telecommuting job and work at home. My husband makes a lot more here than he did in San Diego as an engineer.

To the person that says that people are just "trying to seem progressive" here alluding to that this is Seattlites' form of superficial here couldn't be more incorrect. People here do what they say they will. They are activists, educated/educators, innovators and very environmentally conscious.

People don't compost? To whoever said that, hell yeah we do. You know why? Because our county garbage service MAKES us compost. We cannot throw food in the garbage. That stuff goes in the gd compost bin man. Me? I have land now so I do actual composting for my actual garden that actually gets rained on. A lot.

There is a feeling of social inclusion here that even NYC cannot compare to. This state is, after all, the one whose Attorney Generals are suing Trump over his Muslim ban. We voted for the honorable Senator Bernie Sanders as a majority in the Democratic Primary.

I could go on and on but the REAL reason I came back was to give encouragement to those that want to get out. You should. Do whatever it takes. You only live once. Why be miserable? Very few people have excuses that absolutely keeps them in one place. The rest of you? Get moving!

Safe travels!

joey Galileo Hotto said...

@ Maeve Alleine

Good you found a city that works for you. San Diego doesn't have a lot of variety in terms of engineering jobs, it's mostly clustered in Sorrento Valley. When people say they want to live in SD, they think they will be on the beach eating fish tacos and drinking a mexican imported beer while going surfing and skiing in the same day, but because cost of living is high and wages are so low, it's not going to happen.

Meredith Burns said...

Thank you to everyone who posted on here. All of it gives me hope, and a sense of the quietness in my mind. And I lived in New York for five years, And loved it. And I moved back because I am an only child, and my mother was so sad to have me so far away. I still miss it. Every single thing that everybody wrote about why they to test this place is something that I can agree with. And I plan to leave in the next two years. Thanks again to Ryan for the original post.

Vista said...

Everything I read here makes me feel better, especially because the "reviews" on San Diego are many and so spread along the time, so thanks everybody for posting. I moved here from a vibrant European capital some years ago but still I cannot connect myself to this community and its people, in spite of trying my best. I have lived in (very) large cities both in the US and in Europe but I never I experienced such a cultural boredom and lack of sense of community like here. Meredith Burns, if you read this message and wish some girls chatting coffee time, please email me:

Pottery guy said...

No city is perfect for everyone. I have lived in several and most were worse then San Diego. While far from perfect San Diego is consistently rated as one of the best cities in America and currently holds the number 9 spot on The Numbeo Qualty of Life Index for the world. Luckily there are many places to live and if San Diego isn't "your cup of tea" you can move. Many would feel lucky to be able to live here, but if you are not one of them then I hope you find a location that fulfills your needs.

rhd said...

Pottery Guy : of course San Diego is a great town for a person who lived most of his life in places worse than here, you are so funny!! Keep on having fun here.

milkstache said...
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Joseph G. Hotto said...

@Pottery Guy: You're absolutely right that many places are FAR worse than San Diego, especially in poverty-struken cities and countries throughout the world. But that doesn't excuse the fact that for a city it's size (8th in the US), San Diego is a major let down. This is due to the fact that wages are very low and the cost of living is off the charts, there aren't a lot of jobs outside of retail, biotech and military, there is unreliable public transportation due to people refusing to let go of small town mentality, almost all social events revolve around meeting people at craft breweries, and that it's not as career-driven as cities like San Francisco, Seattle or Los Angeles.

Joseph G. Hotto said...

Creepy P
"Most of those Surfers are turds! It's not like the sixties where people loved nature and the surf now they're out there having fist fights over a wave ....these people are garbage in every way that I can think of"

What beaches were you at? I found people were quite laid back and polite in Swami's beach in Cardiff-by-the-Sea (Encinitas).

Ryan Gerard's Blog said...

I've lived here almost 5 years. The weather is great for the most part. And the public transit works for me. I don't go too far. The problem I have is the overwhelming amount of druggies, crazies, homeless, and thoughtless superficial people. I'm glad I had a chance to live in California, but I spend the vast majority of my time 'on guard' and protecting my body and energy from creeps and losers. The hustlers here are funny. I guess they think I can fall for a hustle because I'm clean and dress well. They don't know that I used to be homeless myself. I don't give my money to homeless people.

Sorry, but San Diego is just an American city on the West Coast. Other than consistently good weather and affordable health care (a major plus) the place is finally very dangerous and cold and alienating. I haven't figured out where to go yet and I'm not sure it's better anywhere else.

The thing about out here is the inordinate amount of drug use. I've seen women and men out here who look like they got hit by a truck. Meth, alcohol, weed. All ages, all races, all creeds. The young and the old. I've seen old men here who are strung out on alcohol. They smell unbelievably bad and you can't ride the bus with them.

Blue said...

The longer I stay in San Diego, the worse my experiences are. If you want to be happy and have real friends that care, leave San Diego. I've done everything to forge friendships--meetup, church, volunteering, going outdoors school, work--all are futile attempts because everyone in SD thinks they are better than any other people. Majority of the people are outrageously FLAKES and superficial than superficial. I was miserable there for 6 years. And now that I am back to town, still California and coastal living, I am much happier!!!!

PhuckSanDiegoAllDayLong said...

This city is the great hustle in America. You'd think from what you hear that this place is fine. It's actually advertised as 'finest city'. But walk these streets and you'll find a very different story. You'll see a grime and volume of drugs and filth and homelessness that will shock you. You'll say to yourself that this kind of poverty doesn't exist in America. But it does. And you'll be flabbergasted.

Transit is fine. Except for the bums and people who stink on there. But air conditioned buses are great.

The people here are egregiously selfish and gimme gimme gimme. Establishing friendships and relationships here are unspeakably difficult. I know many go through this.

The VAST majority of the people here are into substances. Either alcohol or drugs. Again, what you see downtown and even in Mission Valley would shock you. You'd say to yourself that that kind of thing doesn't happen here. Or shouldn't happen here. But it's the high numbers that blow your mind. SO MANY GODDAMN DRUGGIES.

I don't want to go too far in slagging San Diego. California means a lot to Americans. It represents a new start. People bring their hopes, dreams, wishes, and expectations to California. And you would think that beautiful weather would bring some kind of goodness. And I must say there is something to be said for lots of Vitamin D. It's a good thing.

The problem with this town is not the weather. It's the people. The people are simply put, not worth a shit. Community is an afterthought and largely non-existent. The epidemic in America is not's SELFISHNESS. It started with the Boomers and it's been crystalized out here.

And obviously it goes without speaking that the millennial with Daddy's credit card and a Prius is not going to have the same experience as the single guy on Social Security and no car.

I've been here 5 years. I got sober. I completed my wasting of time with the ladies (and they're just as much sex hungry dogs in the street as the men by the way. Don't be fooled by their pretty smiles. They want sex and money.) I did what I had to do here, and I'm leaving in a few weeks. So there's going to be a vacant room here. In the house where I live. You can deal with the strange roommates who are high all the time. You can live in South Park. You can do the San Diego scene. Enjoy it. Try your best to ignore the overwhelming high amount of homelessness. Go to your cute little coffee shops and get your cute tattoos and walk your cute dogs. Come and get it. This is coastal desert and the beach will be the same in 2077 as it is now. Come enjoy the booty shorts en masse and drunks all over the place.

It'll be here waiting for you. And if you can afford the rent, you can have it. But if you decide after a while that San Diego is the asshole of the country, just don't tell the rich Irish girls on vacation because...they think this place is grand.

Maeve Alleine said...
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Maeve Alleine said...

I post here every time I need to rant over a memory of being miserable in SD.

Here's a quick thought... how does a coastal city like SD never have any locally caught fish for sale? What's up with that? Weird, right?

NedFranLosTuck said...

I posted last year, and here I am again.

Holy crap, I haven't found an at-length thread like this, that has lasted for a decade, for the much larger Los Angeles and San Francisco Bay areas.

Wow. Just wow. Impressive. And, for shame, too. San Diego could be the culturally more sane/relaxed/kind alternative to America's mega-cities. And, I think in some ways, it had to have been that alternative decades ago. I can only imagine that San Diego WAS the friendly, chill, quintessential California beach city circa 1980, but that, somewhere around 1990-95, something changed.

Put another way: I say that because I remember having met some native/longtime San Diegans who grew up in the city in the '70s and '80s and were actually pretty chill. So, on-empirically and even non-qualitatively, I find it easy to believe that "polite, friendly" San Diego basically went out the door with the George H.W. Bush administration. (The only exceptions would have been rougher neighborhoods like Barrio Logan, which were actually more violent back in that era than they are today.)

I've visited SD County twice since I posted in '16 (again, I had already moved away). I have a good friend in North County, and one of my favorite burger joints in the world is within a 20-minute drive of his house. And, during one visit, I drove into the city to re-enjoy the beautiful Balboa Park. But, ultimately, I still can't stand staying any longer than about 24 hours in SD County.

NedFranLosTuck said...


Blue said...

There is nothing "chill" about a place where it is all too common to hear people rev their engines at all hours of the day, several days of the week, up and down the street like the road is a Nascar race track; hear people raise their voices when they speak even though there is not another person for a couple of blocks, as if they want attention; or hear, every now and then, someone's engine pop off like a gunshot. If anything, these types of occurrences would leave you on edge. Unless you find a way to cope with them, you will be driven to the brink of insanity. And where I live, it is supposed to be a suburb, a place where you are supposed to get some peace and quiet.

I once stayed in a cheap hotel at the heart of Skid Row in Downtown Los Angeles for a few nights and not even there did I come close to the level of disturbance that I have here.

San Diego is one of those places that you would want to visit, at least, but would not want to live in.

Joseph G. Hotto said...

@Blue- What suburb of SD do you live in? While there are a bunch of douchebags who do donuts in a parking lot or try to act gangster with their beat up Honda Civic, I don't think it's fair to generalize the city this way, because there are people like that everywhere, not just San Diego.

Blue said...

@Joseph Hotto: South County. As far as generalizing San Diego (with specific references to what I had previously mentioned), perhaps my experiences are more predominant where I live. Though, after having been to other major cities in the U.S. (California and elsewhere) and Canada, I can say with a straight face that not everywhere is like this, again referring specifically to where I live. Sure, people anywhere you go are not perfect by any stretch of the imagination (and they never will be), but there seems to be a general lack of social grace (or however you want to label it) which predominates here that you will rarely find anywhere else en masse.

Joseph G. Hotto said...

Yeah, I'd believe that activity would happen in South County, it's the rough part of San Diego, especially in National City.

I live in Carlsbad, which is very wealthy part of North County that used to be more middle class before the recession, and the culture there is more on par with Orange County than San Diego.

Jay Geylor said...

Going on my 17th year here in SD. I stay because I make a great living. I want to speak about the generally lack of interest people have to other people here. I finally understand the natives to a degree. Relationships in SD, both friends and romantic are based on transactions. I mean the way two people get together out here are either due to financial, sexual(appearance) and/or "who" someone can introduce you to. If the relationship is not beneficial in any of those ways it will not happen. Love is not a major factor - which is odd from any other city I have lived. I have lived in 5 major cities in the US by the way. Also, the lack of eye contact and goofiness from a majority of people including adults makes any conversation or connection next to impossible for a deep thinker/someone with passion. The education system here is laughable which makes any educated conversation awkward. Slang terms like Bro, dude, chillin, like, are filler words for lack of vocabulary skills. I can't tell you how many times I used a big word out here and was met with utter confusion and some time aggression due to the individuals inability to comprehend what I am saying. DRUGS, I mean hard core drug users, they don't just smoke a little weed out here, they smoke all day, all night high potency wax. Never having a lucid moment. Meth, pills, heroin you name it someone is on it here. Drinking every day, most people are in the service industry so drinking during work and at home, "everyday" is drinking holiday here. I have seen some of the scuzziest smelliest homeless buying one beer or one airplane size bottle then panhandling the rest of the day with shit stains on their pants. I have seen human feces on the streets and now we have the largest Hep A outbreak in the country. Finest City???? I will continue to make my money and keep my inner circle close. That is how you survive out here, small group of close friends, be selective with who you let in. Believe me the wrong people will start asking for a loan or try an introduce you to some mega church. Crazy witless San Diego!

MidwesternGuy said...

Midwest guy who knows a woman who moved to San Diego. In the seven years she's lived there she's become incredibly addicted to marijuana (smoking high potency wax daily), cocaine, is convinced she needs breast implants, is unhappy, is dating a guy because he can pay for rent out there, seems apathetic towards life, very superficial. Nevertheless, she says she loves it there (despite saying expressly that she's unhappy)

She tried convincing me to move. That will never happen.

Hart DuBois said...

I'm so glad I found this thread. I was so excited to move here four months ago and now I'm so miserable to be here. Why is everything in this city a scam? Why is there so much crime? I've been here four months and I've already had my car broken into and had my things stolen. These apartment complexes are a joke. The management doesn't give a crap about their residents. They aren't there to help. They are there to take your money and that's it. And how is it 2017 and the majority of apartments don't have central air/heat or an in unit washer/dryer? Grow the fuck up San Diego. I don't feel safe here and I hate dealing with any utility/cable/electric company because they are all out to scam you and take your money any way they can.

And the jobs out here are a joke. Ive never had such a difficult time working. The work culture out here is a joke. Companies don't invest in their employees. They sure as Hell don't trust or appreciate their employees, either, and all the companies here have such a high turn around rate which is stupid for them as it makes them lose money.

4 months and I'm already planning on moving. Get me out of here!

Ryan Gerard's Blog said...

I still have a hangover from 5 arduous years in SD. Simply put, there's no big deal about this shithole of a town. Plainly put, this city is a latrine.

Roy Xxx said...

Why does my post no longer appear??

Roy Xxx said...

Ok, I will repost my thoughts on Bland Diego:

1. City and its residents committed to mediocrity
2. Very bland food scene...Malarkey, Cohn Group could not cut it in a true food city. Tijuana has better dining options.
3. Downtown has become a homeless cesspool.
4. Infrastructure awful--potholes everywhere, including wealthy communities
5. Poor police presence, necessitating helicopter flyovers at night that wake up and keep up residents.
6. Inferiority complex v LA and SF. Diegans need constant reassurance their city is nice and that it is relevant.
7. Classless people who dress like slobs and lack basic common sense and courtesy.
8. Sex roles reversed--men very feminine and women masculine.
9. SD looks like an old town, like a Houston or San Antonio, with 1970's Koll architecture.
10. Boring nightlife for professional adults--ok if you are a ninth year junior at SDSU.
11. Weather overrated--chilly in winter (gets down to 40's), exceeds 100 in September with no breeze, May Gray/June gloom, ocean too cold to swim in without wetsuit 9 months of the year, bone dry /itchy skin in winter.
12. Extremely unsophisticated city...tattoos, tank tops, pierced noses and wallet chains are the norm--low class residents for the most part.

Jay Geylor said...

I could not agree more, every point is correct. SD people cannot take criticism at all especially aimed at their fine city. Even though most are transplants. They wander about like zombies, I think they are lonely from not having human contact or emotions. I have never seen a population so hooked on drugs. Moms, Dads, teachers, kids, mail men everyone uses drugs all the time and to cope. For such a beautiful city you have the most depressing boring citizens. If you talk to them too long they glaze over like their brain is seizing. Grown men happy being waiters at Chuck E Cheese riding a skate board to work. Woman that could work at prisons while their men trapes around in skinny jeans cruising gym locker rooms. Men take the nurturing role here, I have never seen such weak men before, I think they would breast feed if they could. I guess there Fathers left when they were young. So little money in their pockets but enough to fill your body with tattoos. They never move anywhere because they could not function or be accepted in a professional environment with what they have done to their body. Hep A, homeless, horrible streets and the list goes on. Get out the ship is sinking!!!!

Roy Xxx said...

San Diego would make the perfect witness protection city.

Yes--very hypersensitive people. When you say something critical about SD you get an infantile 5 year old comment "if you don't like it here, why don't you leave?"

When I was in a sports bar a player on the team I follow didn't go after a fumble and I told my friend next to me, what a pussy...a guy(?) who overheard me came up to me and said I should watch my language as there were women present. I reassured the wuss I was referring to the player on the TV set, not female anatomy.

In a gym I used to workout, there was a sign outside the men's steam room that read "lewd conduct will result in membership termination" (can only imagine what took place in the steam rooom...two their guys working out together--one lifts his shirt so his partner could snap a pic of his abs....cannot make this crap up and have not seen this in other cities I've lived in.

I have never seen so many people proud of so little--witness the crowds that attend opening day at Del Mar..,bunch of $25K/year millionaires trying to impress the next $25K/year millionaire.

Roy Xxx said...

Also, I agree with your point about many Diegans' fathers probably having left the family when they were young. Very poor male role models, let alone successful ones, in SD....I grew up in a fairly affluent community on Long Island yet never would have made it past the 7th grade (crap beat out of me) if I acted like the majority of wussy guys that walk around the streets of SD....for many, becoming the head doorman at Fluxx nightclub is their "career aspiration".

When I grew up in NY, half the women in my class became professionals--doctors, attorneys, marketing executives, advertising, CPA's, was a turn on for me to date not only a very attractive woman but also one who was accomplished as I just described. In SD you have struck gold if you meet a pharmaceutical sales rep or real estate agent.

Roy Xxx said...

Add to earlier list above:

13. Take away the word or topic of weather and you have effectively reduced 90% of the typical San Diegans vocabulary and talking points.

14. SD has in common with OC that "we're not LA"--no shit, Sherlock, LA is an actual cosmopolitan city. OC has more successful people than SD but there are areas such as ultra snooty, WASPy Newport Beach where people go out of their way to tell you how great they are (or think they are) that regard, OC and SD share the same boring slice of homogeneous suburbia....and Northern Californians, specifically SF, look down at (with good reason) and hate all of SoCal with most SoCalifornians being oblivious to that considering to many their vast homogeneous travel exposure is limited to Vegas, Hawaii and Cabo.

Roy Xxx said...

15. I have never met so many people who took 6-7 years to graduate a 4 year university, as I have in San Diego. Back east, you would be considered mentally retarded.

Roy Xxx said...

16. Contrary to popular belief many places in SD do require Air conditioning and SD has some of the highest utilities costs in the nation.

I averaged $200+ month, with a high of $250, between July and September in SD in a 1250 sq ft condo downtown right off the bay (not inland)...contrast that with where I am now in Miami (in Brickell, right by the bay) where $82 was my highest bill last August.

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